Coach Mellor Quote #117

Quote from Coach Mellor in Bachelor Party

Coach Mellor: All right, we got a two-minute limit. You're gonna have to circle back around. Next!
Beverly: I am not getting back in that line. Look at how long it is.
Coach Mellor: It's that long because of you!
Adam: Mom, let us out!
Beverly: Boys, just climb out the window. Go, go, go! [horn honks] Schmoopie, no! Don't go headfirst!
Adam: I got to see what I'm landing on. I don't want to get a gravel rash.
Coach Mellor: All right, this circus act is unacceptable.
Adam: Oh, no! My glasses!
Coach Mellor: Forget 'em. You got four other senses.

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 ‘Bachelor Party’ Quotes

Quote from Bill Lewis

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Even though my mom treated my dad to a new Bitter, it just made him more bitter than ever.
Murray: I mean it, Bevy. I'm returning that damn car. The last thing I need is the Ferrari of Austria.
Bill Lewis: Sure you do. Those people make a quality product. They gave us the boomerang and Crocodile Dundee.
Beverly: It's Austria, not Australia. My God. Just let me handle this, okay?

Quote from Bill Lewis

Adult Adam: [v.o.] In that moment, my dad would ask a question that would change the course of history.
Murray: What's that?
John Calabasas: That, my friend, is the Bitter. It's Austrian. So very rare.
Murray: Kind of looks like a Ferrari. I really loved those as a kid.
Beverly: Come on, Murray. For once in your life, just treat yourself.
Bill Lewis: And what a treat! Hey, Mur! Individual seat heaters! You know what they call that? "The marriage saver." Maybe if I had these bun toasters, I'd still be married. [laughs] Who am I kidding? We had separate bedrooms, only said hi in the hallway. But come on! Ah, [bleep] it.

Quote from Barry

Barry: Time to talk bachelor party, best man. Last night, I taped a movie off Cinemax starring Tom Hanks that forever changed my life. "Bachelor Party."
Dave Kim: My dad said that movie was a raunchy shlockfest that celebrates the lowest form of comedy.
Barry: Your dad knows his stuff. It is brilliant, and I want it to be the blueprint for my zany bachelor party.
Adam: What exactly do you mean by "zany"?
Barry: I'm talking about a giant rager in a hotel suite with sketchy babes, unruly Japanese businessmen, and a beer-guzzling mule that passes out.
Adam: That sounds very adult.
Barry: Exactly! Everyone's saying I'm just a dumb kid who's stupidly getting married. But this party will prove I'm a dumb adult who's stupidly getting married.