Beverly: Can't you just get past it? He's your family.
Coach Mellor: You sound like Mama, God rest her soul.
Beverly: You mean..?
Coach Mellor: She died doing what she loved, though. Frog squats.
Beverly: Coach, does your brother have any idea what he's done to you?
Coach Mellor: That's what Mama asked me, right before she did that last ill-advised rep that sent her to the final cool-down in the sky. Oh, Mama, why'd you have to crush it so hard?

Coach Mellor: All right, that's it! You're outta here! [whistle blows]
Coach Nick: Did you just blow your whistle at me?
Coach Mellor: Yeah, I did! And according to the laws of coaching, that means you got to take a lap!
Coach Nick: No. You take the lap! [whistle blows]
Coach Mellor: How dare you blow your whistle at me in my gymnatorium?! You have no right!
Coach Nick: But I do. This is the Blare-X 2000, the Champagne of whistles, given only to college coaches. So, my whistle wins.
Coach Mellor: Anybody can get a whistle. What really matters is what's in here, and you and I both know I always give 110%.
Coach Nick: And everyone knows I give 111.
Coach Mellor: That's not possible! Everybody knows that 110% is the maximum!

Adam: But this wasn't my fault. I was targeted in gym class.
Beverly: Targeted?! Who targeted my smooshy-tushed baby boy?
Barry: 'Twas I.
Beverly: Barry, what have I told you about picking on poor Adam?
Adult Adam: [v.o.] Then came the Mom guilt trip unique to brothers everywhere.
Beverly: You realize that one day, I'll be gone, and the only thing you'll have is each other.