Coach Mellor Quote #68

Quote from Coach Mellor in Goldberg on The Goldbergs

Beverly: Can't you just get past it? He's your family.
Coach Mellor: You sound like Mama, God rest her soul.
Beverly: You mean..?
Coach Mellor: She died doing what she loved, though. Frog squats.
Beverly: Coach, does your brother have any idea what he's done to you?
Coach Mellor: That's what Mama asked me, right before she did that last ill-advised rep that sent her to the final cool-down in the sky. Oh, Mama, why'd you have to crush it so hard?


 ‘Goldberg on The Goldbergs’ Quotes

Quote from Coach Mellor

Coach Mellor: All right, that's it! You're outta here! [whistle blows]
Coach Nick: Did you just blow your whistle at me?
Coach Mellor: Yeah, I did! And according to the laws of coaching, that means you got to take a lap!
Coach Nick: No. You take the lap! [whistle blows]
Coach Mellor: How dare you blow your whistle at me in my gymnatorium?! You have no right!
Coach Nick: But I do. This is the Blare-X 2000, the Champagne of whistles, given only to college coaches. So, my whistle wins.
Coach Mellor: Anybody can get a whistle. What really matters is what's in here, and you and I both know I always give 110%.
Coach Nick: And everyone knows I give 111.
Coach Mellor: That's not possible! Everybody knows that 110% is the maximum!

Quote from Beverly

Adam: But this wasn't my fault. I was targeted in gym class.
Beverly: Targeted?! Who targeted my smooshy-tushed baby boy?
Barry: 'Twas I.
Beverly: Barry, what have I told you about picking on poor Adam?
Adult Adam: [v.o.] Then came the Mom guilt trip unique to brothers everywhere.
Beverly: You realize that one day, I'll be gone, and the only thing you'll have is each other.

 Coach Mellor Quotes

Quote from A Chorus Lie

Coach Mellor: Goldfarb! Wheel it in. Time for a private huddle. I'm going to put this delicately, kid. You smell like a gym sock's butt.
Adam: Uh, thanks.
Coach Mellor: You smell like a garlic diaper.
Adam: Thanks?
Coach Mellor: You smell like egg salad left in a humidifier.
Adam: Thanks.
Coach Mellor: I assume you don't notice because you live with that stink 24/7.
Adam: Oh no. I smell it.
Coach Mellor: There's half a Speed Stick in my desk. It's yours now. Be liberal with it. Coach is on your team, here. It's why I pulled you aside to avoid embarrassment.
Adam: I guess I would have preferred you pulled me aside just a little farther.

Quote from The Day After the Day After

Mr. Glascott: Okay, everyone, welcome to "The Day After" emergency assembly. First of all, I just want to assure you that everything is gonna be okay.
Coach Mellor: It will not be okay! There's nowhere to hide in a nuclear winter!
Mr. Glascott: Whoa. (chuckles) What Coach means is that there could be a nuclear winter, but it definitely won't happen.
Coach Mellor: Till it does.
Mr. Glascott: Does not, because it was just a movie.
Coach Mellor: That will, for sure, come true.
Mr. Glascott: Look, I know a lot of you are scared that the President is gonna snap, push a button, and incinerate us all, but I assure you, it will not happen.
Coach Mellor: When it does, I'll be safe and snug in my fallout shelter while the rest of you mutants scrounge for cockroaches.