Barry: Dad, we need you to sign a permission slip.
Murray: Ask your mother.
Erica: She's not home.
Murray: I hope it's not time-sensitive. Good luck to both of you.
Erica: We both got jobs at Spencer's Gifts, and we can't start until we get parental consent.
Murray: Give it to me! I'll sign it right now!
Barry: Before you do, you should really understand what you're agreeing to.
Murray: I agree.
Erica: Just know if you sign that slip, there's a good chance we'll become fully independent and move out.
Murray: Damn it, where's my pen?
Barry: You might not even have to pay for college.
Murray: I need my pen!
Barry: Here you go, Father.
Murray: Let's sign this baby.
Barry: And that's just one of the many hilarious items we'll be selling at Spencer Gifts.
Murray: Not even you being a moron can spoil my mood. This is the greatest day of my life! Uh, this'll work.

Adam: It was terrible. They shook me down for all my quarters.
Pops: Was one dressed like a ditzy redhead and the other like a smart-alec shoeshiner?
Murray: Albert, not everything is a grift.

Beverly: Yeah, I stare at him, too. (chuckles) It's hard to believe that the bigger he gets, the more delicious he becomes, huh?
Erica: Are we looking at the same thing? The hell is in your son's hands right now?
Barry: Why does he have a waterproof Sports Boom Box with mega bass when we had to get jobs to get one?
Beverly: Adam is not like the two of you. He can't just work any old job. He's, uh- What do I want to say here? Better than you.
Barry: He's better than you!
Erica: You can't say that!
Beverly: I knew you'd understand.