Bill Lewis Quote #4
Quote from Bill Lewis in I Heart Video Dating
Bill Lewis: Hi, this is Bill Lewis of Bill Lewis Flooring and Tile. I'm looking for a nice, clean lady to spend my days with. It used to be my wife.
Lainey: Oh, no.
Bill Lewis: Man, she was pretty. Smelled nice. Tight, little body from all the Jane Fonda. Son of a bitch, Billy Boy! You had it all!
Erica: No.
Beverly: Ouch.
Lainey: Daddy?
Bill Lewis: One day she just walked out on me. All she left behind was this single leg warmer. I wear it on my arm to keep her close.
Erica: Not good.
Beverly: Hard to watch.
Bill Lewis: Dang it, I miss you so much, pookie! [sniffles] So, so much! Also, you must be stacked. I'm so, so sorry.
The Goldbergs Quotes
‘I Heart Video Dating’ Quotes
Quote from Adam
Adam: I see it now. We open on a time portal as Mr. Lewis' cold, naked body spills to the Earth. He rises from the smoke like a Love Terminator.
Erica: Yeah, no nudity or time travel. Just make Mr. Lewis look cool. You know, macho.
Adam: We're making a picture! An Adam F. Goldberg joint.
Erica: What's with the "F"?
Adam: There's another Adam Goldberg at school. He's super-sensitive. I don't want to cause any marketplace confusion.
Erica: Don't worry about it. No one cares about either of you.
Quote from Beverly
Lainey: Dad, it's been four years since Mom left. Isn't it time you got set up with someone?
Beverly: Set up? Did somebody say "set up"? Who am I setting up?
Erica: No, stop. We don't need your help. Bill's gonna do video dating.
Beverly: Video dating? [chuckles] [robotic voice] Beep, boop, bop, zorp. Beep, boop, bop. I will find you love.
Erica: Sorry, but, uh, your way of matchmaking is a thing of the past.
Beverly: [normal voice] Please. I am literally responsible for setting up over 200 couples, which means I'm personally responsible for over 62,000 babies.
Erica: Yeah, that's not real math.
Quote from Adam
Adam: Hey, what are you doing?
Erica: Destroying this and starting over.
Adam: But I gave you exactly what you asked for: macho. Your dad was a shirtless cowboy, a sweaty cop, a leather-clad biker. Oh, I see it now.