TV Quotes

Beverly: Somebody stole my baby. Well, not real baby, fake baby. It's a toy. Somebody stole my toy! I'm going to get attitude from my son's pretend wife. Can someone call the police? Or Toys 'r Us? I don't [beep] know any more.

Beverly: Ssh, baby's sleeping. Just kidding. Her eyes are wide open all the time.

Beverly: Okay, there are some ugly accusations flying about. And if that's not Myrna, then I have failed as a grandmother.

Adam: How about a toast to the world's greatest mom?
Beverly: Somebody call me? No? Okay.

Beverly: [beep] me sideways. I have raised some thoughtful children.

Beverly: Are you crying?
Adam: No.
Beverly: Who hurt you? Tell me and I will hurt them tenfold.

Virginia Kremp: Oh please, I've seen Adam doing horseplay when I have specifically requested no horse play. He's no angel.
Beverly: Oh, he is an angel. He could literally sprout wings and take flight at any moment.