‘O Captain! My Captain!’
Season 4, Episode 11 - Aired January 4, 2017
After Beverly sees "Dead Poets Society", she tries to inspire Barry as a substitute teacher. Meanwhile, Adam learns about the difficulties of being a teenage girl.
Quote from Coach Mellor
Adam: Whoa. Hey, hang on!
Coach Mellor: This better be important, Goldfarb.
Adam: It is. You double-skinned.
Coach Mellor: Oh, how about that? I did double-skin.
Adam: But you can't double-skin. It's Shirt, Skin, Shirt, Skin.
Coach Mellor: I can Skin-Skin anytime I like.
Adam: If you Skin-Skin, there's no rules. It's chaos. Maybe now you'll know what it feels like to be a young girl coming of age.
Adam: Wait, is this about Emmy?
Coach Mellor: The best teachers never reveal if it's about Emmy.
Adam: So it is about Emmy.
Coach Mellor: You should have just eaten the note. Everybody eats the note!
Adam: Why do people think eating paper is a viable option?!
Quote from Coach Mellor
Coach Mellor: Just for the back-talk, you're a skin for the rest of the week.
Adam: No!
Coach Mellor: Now you're a Skin for the rest of the year! You keep it up, you'll be a Skin for life!
Adam: You can't do that.
Coach Mellor: Trust me. On your wedding day, you will walk down the aisle shirtless.
Adam: No respectable venue would allow that.
Coach Mellor: It'll be a beach wedding.
Adam: (groans) That sounds wonderful and like my worst nightmare.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Attention, people in the room. I have a huge announcement about my future that I need to rub in my mother's face.
Murray: No, no, no. We said we were gonna be rubbing at a much later date.
Barry: I'm sorry, Dad. I couldn't wait for Harvard to beg me to join their ranks. This is too good. It must be rubbed.
Beverly: Wait, did I hear "Harvard"? I think I heard "Harvard."
Barry: Oh, you heard it.
Quote from Beverly
Barry: Sorry, mom, you lose.
Murray: We've heard enough.
Barry: I will succeed in life just to spite you.
Murray: No!
Barry: What'chu have to say about that?
Beverly: This is the happiest [bleep] day of my [bleep] life!
Quote from Murray
Murray: I may have slightly motivated the kid using you as a springboard for his hate. Yeah, you get it.
Quote from Adam
Adam: I need you to give this note to Emmy and make her read it.
Erica: She's still not talking to you, huh?
Adam: Honestly, she's being crazy and irrational, but as you can see in this note, I'm the bigger man and still willing to apologize.
Erica: "Dear Emmy, you're being crazy and irrational. Let me explain the many reasons why your super-silly female body issues are all in your head." No.