Jackie: It's still weird between me and my old boyfriend.
Adam: Uh, where is he? All I see is Ruben Amaro Jr. casually displaying his athleticism.
Jackie: Yeah. That's my ex.
Adam: Wait. You were with Ruben Amaro Jr.? The Ruben Amaro Jr.?
Jackie: From seventh to ninth grade. Why?
Adam: You spanned three grades with the guy who isn't afraid to change into his gym clothes without a towel around his waist? This is not okay!

Barry: Told you, bro. All love ends.
Adam: Stop! We'll work it out.
Barry: No, you won't. You'll just end up like me, sniffing a sweater Lainey left in my room to remind me of her.
Adam: That's Mom's.
Barry: No!

Pops: Bev, stop with the crying. I can't hear the children say stupid things.
Beverly: [sobbing] But my baby is graduating from high school, a day I've been dreading since she graduated from my body.
Murray: She's gone forever! Hoo-hoo! One down, two to go!
Pops: I think both of your attitudes are very extreme and terrible.

Barry: Dude, how could you leave early and not tell me?
Lainey: I'll explain everything when the time is right, which is not now!
Barry: No! No way. Do not walk away from me.
Lainey: I'm not walking away. I'm slowly and deliberately marching to receive my diploma.

Principal Ball: And we'll just move right along to Erica Goldberg.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] My sister was steps away from starting her adult life, but as she stood speechless on that stage, nothing scared her more.
Erica: Yeah, I'm good.
Principal Ball: Erica, please let's just end this. Just take it.
Erica: No.
Principal Ball: Take the diploma.
Erica: Pass.
Principal Ball: You can't pass.
Erica: But I can, and I do.
Principal Ball: Take it.

Beverly: Coach Mellor, we meet again one last, final time.
Coach Mellor: I take it you read that little note I left for Erica. All right, let's tango.
Beverly: She's not coming. It's just me.
Coach Mellor: But I kind of need her here. I had a big, angry speech meant to guilt and shame her for missing my class 27 times this year.
Beverly: This is an outrage. You have no right to target her t- 27 times? Wow. That's a lot.
Coach Mellor: And she forged a doctor's note saying she couldn't run or jump because of "lady problems."

Beverly: How dare you accuse her of forgery when you- "Dr. Edmund T. Doctorman." Oh, come on.

Coach Mellor: I warned her for three years: fail gym, pay the price.
Beverly: Okay, she's still a wonderful girl, and I will stop at nothing until you give me that diploma.
Coach Mellor: Ugh. Here you go.
Beverly: That's it?
Coach Mellor: Brace yourself. Ready to have your mind blown? I have no real power. My greatest weapon is threatening the kids with failing gym. So, every year, I terrify the attractive, popular kids to let them know that their actions have consequences, even though they really, really don't.
Beverly: Oh, I'm sorry. Do you want me to call Erica and bring her in here?
Coach Mellor: Eh, the moment's gone. You raised an amazing woman, Beverly Goldberg. It's been a pleasure doing battle with you.

Barry: Ugh! Look at us! Look at us closely and know that one day you'll end up just like us, you ridiculous children.
Jackie: This is getting weird and insulting.
Lainey: All right. You'll see. We're the future you, and it sucks hard.

Adam: Dana! Hey! How are things going up in here? I was gonna call.
Adam: I'm back for the summer. This summer? That's crazy! I'm crazy! Summer! Hot times! Fun in the sun! Camp.

Jackie: I'm Jackie.
Dana: Hi. Dana.
Adam: Sorry! Yes! Jackie, meet Dana! Dana, meet Jackie! Introductions, new friends Not friends, just street ladies, ladies of the street. No. You know what I mean.
Dana: Well, when you're free, we should get together and catch up.
Adam: Ketchup! Mustard, pickles, onions on a sesame-seed bun. Welp, great seeing everybody. Bye, now. [runs away]