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Dungeons and Dragons, Anyone?

‘Dungeons and Dragons, Anyone?’

Season 3, Episode 20 - Aired April 6, 2016

Adam convinces Coach Mellor to let him be team captain in gym class. He betrays his friends by picking the jocks first, causing the two rivaling squads to battle it out with the game the nerds know best – Dungeons and Dragons! Meanwhile, Erica decides where she wants to go to college but encounters resistance from both Beverly and Murray.

Quote from Mr. Glascott

Murray: Okay, compromise. The moron boys can get the hell out, but my little peanut, she's going to school in Philadelphia.
Mr. Glascott: I get it. I got a bird. She's my princess. If she flew away, I don't know what I would do.

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Quote from Barry

Barry: What's with the getup? Is there, like, a sports musical you're starring in?
Adam: Little production called gym class, and Coach Mellor's letting me be the leading man.
Barry: He made you captain? This is a game changer. You got to pick smart.
Adam: For sure. First my boy Sirota, then Dave Kim, Tiny Tyler, Lanky Hank, and the foreign-exchange kid who knows nothing of our customs.
Barry: No! This is the only time you'll ever be captain. You can't pick the wienies. You got to pick the winners, earn their respect. This is a defining moment for you, bro.

Quote from Pops

Pops: I can't get over it. He throws a party in his dorm room after specifically being told not to.

Quote from Pops

Murray: All right, look at this movie. That's what college is. Do you want Erica to end up in a hot tub with an elderly businessman?
Pops: Okay, you're kind of taking some of the tickle out of the movie for me.

Quote from Barry

Adam: Just go away. This is hopeless.
Barry: That's where you're wrong. The only problem is, you guys don't speak the same language. You speak lazy-eyed nerd, and, like me, you speak awesome, all-star athlete.

Quote from Barry

Barry: Even though I'm ripped like you, my body has also been infected by my brother's crippling geekery. I tried to fight it, but it's too powerful. And it's led to this.
Adam: Dude, you created a D and D character?
Barry: Lord Big of Tasty. I wanted one ready in case you asked me to play, but you never did.
Adam: I just assumed you didn't care.
Barry: Point is, if this crazy-jacked bro can learn how to play D and D, other super-shredded bros can, too.

Quote from Beverly

Beverly: I'm going to Carnegie Mellon with Erica.
Erica: No.
Beverly: We're gonna be roommates.
Erica: No!
Beverly: We're gonna sneak in a hot plate to cook ramen soup.
Erica: Never!
Beverly: And then we're gonna rush the same sorority.
Erica: This is a nightmare.
Beverly: And I'll be her mother and her sister.
Erica: Kill me.

Quote from Beverly

Erica: What is wrong with you people?! Seriously, I get no respect! No respect.
Beverly: That's exactly what Rodney Dangerzone says. See? We are on the same team.

Quote from Beverly

Beverly: Oh, no. Not this game. I heard all about it on "60 Minutes". A stuffy Southern reverend said it's the gateway to black magic.
Adam: Don't worry, guys. I got this. Okay, mama, I won't play the thing that makes my heart happy.
Beverly: You bewitched me, you little devil. [smooching]
Adam: Look away. I'm doing this for us.
Beverly: Dungeons and Snuggles! Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah. I'm a little devil, and I like kisses.

Quote from Murray

Erica: Dad, you need to come with us. Mom is in full sabotage mode. This is my dream.
Murray: And it's my dream to have one less moron living in this house. I'll help you.

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