Geoff: Hey, hon, where's the flashlight?
Erica: I dunno. I thought you packed it.
Geoff: You didn't pack the flashlight? I specifically said, "Make sure you pack it."
Erica: Why would I pack it? You pack our stuff. It makes no sense.
Geoff: Doesn't matter. 'Cause we're so in-sync as a couple that we can still assemble this.
Erica: Just put the thing in the thingy.
Geoff: Real helpful, babe.

Barry: The good news is you don't have to worry about wolves. I spread my scent all over this place.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] On the heels of my first shift at the local creamery, I was ready to relate to my working-stiff friends.
Adam: Mind if I sit? My dogs are barking. Long shift at the ol' factory. You know, like a character in a Bruce Springsteen song.
Brian: Don't you just put gummy bears on soft serve?
Adam: Sometimes. But payday can't come soon enough, amirite? [chuckles] Management's the worst, amirite? [chuckles] Minimum wage is a maximum bummer, amirite?
Adult Adam: [v.o.] Turns out my blue collar was not a good color on me.
Adam: I don't get it. First you said we couldn't relate because I didn't have a job, but now I have one and that's still not right.
Brea: That's because you're acting like working is just some big joke. Where'd you even get that mechanic's shirt?
Adam: This is from when I portrayed Louis DiMucci in Grease 2. The school paper called my performance "vaguely offensive."
Brea: See what I mean? Working to you is putting on a costume and pretending to be someone you're not. I need my paycheck. You clearly don't.

Beverly: Ready for a hilarious story? Remember last week when I had Stanley fired for being a lazy butcher? [chuckles] Well, look at this razor-thin salami. Hmm? The new guy is the real deal.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] In that moment, I realized I had a choice. I could work harder to prove to my girlfriend the kind of man I was, or...
Adam: Mama? My boss, Randy, is not a nice man.
Beverly: What are these horrible words? Tell me everything.
Adam: For starters, he tells me when to be there and what to do.
Beverly: Who does he think he is?
Pops: His boss?
Adam: And he told me my ice cream clown cake was bad.
Pops: Oh, no.
Adam: Randy told me to throw it in the trash at my house so it doesn't haunt the store.
Beverly: Somebody needs to tell Randy that you have a unique perspective and once-in-a-generation talent.
Pops: [mouth full] This is a huge mistake, Adam.
Adam: Are you eating the cake?
Pops: Well, it's ice cream.

Erica: Oh, God. The entire time I thought music was my thing, it was really yours?
Geoff: It's fine. Cello can't compare to the love of a woman. Even though its evocative curves do remind me of one.
Erica: This is super upsetting!
Geoff: It's not like I kissed it or danced with it or anything!
Erica: Not that. That you let me railroad you and gave up something you love. I don't want that.
Geoff: That was ages ago. I don't do that stuff anymore. I'm assertive now. Which is how you're suggesting I should be, right?

Beverly: Where's this Randy fella?
Randy: Can I help you?
Beverly: No. But I can help you. Rule number one... never tell my schmoopaloo what to do.
Randy: That'd be a whole lot easier if I knew what a schmoopaloo is.
Brea: She means him.
Beverly: Rule number two... no physical labor. No lifting, mopping, or scooping.
Randy: That's pretty much the whole gig.
Beverly: Rule number three... you will double his salary and let him work from home on Tuesdays.
Randy: Or I have a better solution. Adam, you're super fired.
Beverly: No! I fire you!
Adam: Okay, Mom! I think I got it from here.
Beverly: Good for you, honey. Oh. You know, for a new manager, you are showing great leadership. You're lucky to have this one, Brea. [clicks tongue]

Adult Adam: [v.o.] I had lost my job and my girlfriend's respect, but for my mom, it was a big win.
Beverly: There's my brave boy. Come and sit. I made pancake dippers for dinner to celebrate your early retirement.
Pops: Oy vey.
Adam: Just stop, okay? Because of you, my whole life, I've wanted for nothing. I've never known hunger or pain or disappointment of any kind.
Beverly: Oh, baby, that's the best thanks a mama could have.
Adam: Gah! How can you just sit there? Talk to your daughter, dammit.
Pops: Thing is, kiddo, she's not wrong this time. You are.
Adam: What in God's name are you talking about?
Pops: Hey, you didn't like working hard, so you took the easy way out. 'Course Brea doesn't like that. Frankly, I don't either.

Barry: What's up, un-sexy friends?
Geoff: Please say you weren't making out in the stacks. That's where knowledge lives.
Barry: We ruined so many books and periodicals.

Brea: It's not just that. I mean, have you ever had an after-school job?
Adam: My mom says my main job is to get home safely.
Brea: Do you hear yourself?
Adam: Back me up here, fellas. You guys don't have jobs, do you?
JC Spink: I deliver pizzas. You've be amazed how many people have cat habitats.