Barry: Read it and weep, suckers.
Naked Rob: What's this?
Barry: Oh. Just the best college resume ever assembled.
Matt: Three-letter varsity athlete? Captain of the diving team? Geology club? Dude, you didn't do any of these things.
Geoff: It says you're the treasurer of the Model UN?
Barry: I once gave that foreign kid who smells like beets a quarter to buy a donut, so that pretty much makes me official treasurer of the Model UN.
Geoff: Except you're not 'cause I am! In the name of Luxembourg, I declare war on your lies! We don't have a real army, so it's more of a symbolic gesture.