John Calabasas: Hi. Are you headed into First National Bank?
Erica: Um, yeah?
John Calabasas: Because I can literally save you tens of seconds by handling all your important banking matters right here at this folding table.
Erica: 9th National Bank? Is that a thing?
John Calabasas: It sure is. We may be ninth, but we always put our customers first at this bank. Not actually a bank, not FDIC insured.
Erica: Doesn't matter. I need a credit card, and I need one fast.
John Calabasas: Normally, it takes about two weeks. But I can see you're not here for any weird reason.
Erica: Definitely not.
John Calabasas: So what's your name?
Erica: It's uh...
John Calabasas: See, people don't normally pause this much on the most basic question there is.
Erica: It's Beverly. Beverly Goldberg.
John Calabasas: Perfect, Beverly. One moment, please. [on the pay phone] Hola. Como estas? Es Juan Calabasas en la oficina de Jenkintown. Una pregunta, por favor. Es Beverly Goldberg una criminal? Bueno! Bueno, bueno. Muchas gracias. [to Erica] Beverly, I have great news. Your credit is excelente, so I just need to see a photo ID.
Erica: Yeah, um, it's...
John Calabasas: Hurry up, please.
Erica: Oh, there it is.
John Calabasas: Well, your thumb is over the first name, but I can see your last name is Goldberg, so let's get you that credit card.
Erica: Great! Great! And I would like to take a cash advance made out to Erica Goldberg.
John Calabasas: Whatever you need, Beverly.
Erica: Bueno.