Adult Adam: [v.o.] Back in the '80s, water parks were the peak of childhood fun. They were wet, wild, and incredibly dangerous. Seriously, what were we thinking?
Mr. Glascott: Adam, do you have a moment to talk about our Lord and Savior? Joshin'. [chuckles] I am here to talk about something way less urgent than your holy salvation... our local water park.
Adam: Riptide Waters?
Mr. Glascott: I'm here gathering signatures to shut the park down. Would you care to add your Johnny Hancock?
Barry: Hell no. Riptide Waters is a beloved institution. I spent many a summer splashing, sunning, and forcing Adam down slides he wasn't legally tall enough to go down.
Adam: Can't see tears when you're dripping wet.