‘An Itch Like No Other’
Season 9, Episode 5 - Aired October 20, 2021
Beverly and Adam start to feel that their new neighbour, Mr. Glascott, is intruding on their lives. Meanwhile, Geoff and Erica get a taste of parenting when they care for an injured Barry.
Quote from Beverly
Adult Adam: [v.o.] And Mom was hot on the trail of getting Mr. Glascott a new pal.
Mr. Glascott: Hey, neighbor! Look who's chatting up well-known crank, Mr. Woodburn.
Mr. Woodburn: Yeah, I'm confused, too. She asked me a question, I responded, and it just kept going.
Beverly: Well, you know, until today, I hadn't taken the time to get to know Dale, and I'm learning so much. Like, did you know he made his own canoe?
Mr. Glascott: Ooh! For work or play?
Mr. Woodburn: Strictly play. Woodburn gets after it on the weekends.
Beverly: [gasps] Here's a fun idea. John, do you remember the other night when I came home from work and you were waiting for me on my porch?
Mr. Glascott: Yes, I had made a Cobb salad and had half a head of lettuce left over to share.
Beverly: No, the other night when you wanted to read me your bucket list.
Mr. Glascott: Oh, yes. I made a few updates and wanted to get her feedback.
Beverly: Wasn't "canoe trip" on there? You had moved it up from to and then moved down "try sushi."
Mr. Glascott: And that reminds me, I undercooked some salmon and ate it anyway. Do you think that counts?
Beverly: No. Woodburn, aren't you gonna take that canoe out this weekend?
Mr. Woodburn: Yeah, maiden voyage. Where is this going?
Beverly: I'm just saying, maybe you two should go canoeing together on Saturday.
Mr. Woodburn: Holy crap. Is my one-man watercraft becoming a two-man watercraft?
Mr. Glascott: Wait, you'd like for me to join you?
Mr. Woodburn: Couple of bachelors on the Delaware without a care in the world and a lifetime of regret. That's got legs.
Mr. Glascott: Hmm. Okay, I guess.
Beverly: [chuckles] Yay! Friendships forming everywhere.
Quote from Geoff
Erica: Oh, Barry is sound asleep. You want to slip out and catch a movie? I thought we could see Twins.
Geoff: Oh. No, thank you. [chuckles nervously]
Erica: I hear it's a hoot. Because they're unlikely twins.
Geoff: Yeah, no, I get the premise. One's tiny, the other's Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Erica: Why wouldn't you want to see a very popular movie with me? Could it be because you weren't at the lab and you've already seen it?
Geoff: Oh, no! You know!
Erica: Damn right, I know! You were the one who said this was parent practice.
Geoff: It was just harder than I thought it would be.
Erica: And then you bail on me? What does that say?
Geoff: It says I'm a bad daddy! A, a bad boy who's gonna be a bad daddy! Bad-boy daddy! That's me! [groans] [door slams]
Barry: [o.s.] Who woke me up? I'm cranky now!
Quote from Murray
Murray: That grill is unreal. Not only does it sear to perfection, but it makes me hate people less.
Beverly: Yep, the barbecue is a smash. And even better, I didn't take this away from John. I gave him a friendship.
Murray: Taking what you're saying at face value and not digging deeper.
Quote from Beverly
Beverly: John, we could have had lots of different folks live next door. But I chose you. Do you know why?
Mr. Glascott: No, but I hope it's gonna make me feel better, because I really don't want to cry in front of you.
Beverly: I wanted to be your neighbor.
Mr. Glascott: You did?
Beverly: Yes. And I am sorry about the barbecue. I should have just been honest. But you have been coming on a little strong.
Mr. Glascott: [sighs] "A little strong"? I've been a lunatic. I was just so happy to get a fresh start. I only wanted to impress you and be your friend.
Beverly: That's the whole point. We already are friends.
Mr. Glascott: Dang it, now I am gonna cry.
Beverly: Come on, why don't you come by the barbecue? There are still some neighbors you haven't met yet.
Mr. Glascott: Thank you, Beverly. I'd love that.
Quote from Adam
Adam: Coming through! I'm not even sure what it is, but its eyes are so wet!
Quote from Erica
Erica: Hey, can we talk?
Geoff: Look, I'm so sorry about the movie.
Erica: No, it's okay. I wasn't as helpful with Barry because the truth is, I was scared.
Erica: I know it's just Barry, but the minute you said "parent practice," I freaked out. It came to you so easily, and everything I did seemed wrong.
Geoff: Well, it may have seemed that way, but I freaked out, too.
Erica: You did?
Geoff: The more Barry needed us, the more I imagined what it'd really be like.
Erica: Well, I always assumed we'd make great parents, but I guess we'll never know until we get there.
Quote from Barry
Geoff: Oh, my God, is he...
Erica: Walking on his own?
Geoff: Come to us! One step at a time.
Erica: You got this, bud.
Barry: I'm scared.
Geoff: We're here for you.
Erica: Keep going!
Geoff: You got this.
Barry: I did it! [all laugh] I did it!
Geoff: You sure did, champ. You sure did.
Erica: We are so proud of you.
Barry: Oh, guys, you know, thank you so much for taking care of me. You're really great at it. All right, now, move out the way. I'm gonna try to make it to the fridge.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] Life is filled with obstacles. Including the ones we put in front of ourselves. Like when we try too hard, desperate for everything to be perfect, or when we don't try at all because we're afraid to fail. But no matter what, the first steps to success are easier to take when the people you care about are right by your side.