Mr. Perott: Adam, let me ask you something... why NYU?
Adam: The film program. It's top notch.
Mr. Perott: Then you want to be a filmmaker? Well, then it's all good.
Adam: Oh, great. I was starting to worry NYU wasn't an option.
Mr. Perott: That's a good instinct, because you'll never get in there. But that's okay. Listen, college isn't always a necessity if you want to be a filmmaker. I bet a lot of your film heroes never even went to fancy film school.
Adam: Heck, Tony Scott had a worthless art degree, and he made "Top Gun."
Mr. Perott: There you go. Take the money you would've given to NYU and go make a movie. And put Bob Balaban in it. He's fantastic.
Adam: I dunno.
Mr. Perott: What about Hector Elizondo?
Adam: No, they're both solid character actors that deserve their own thing, but I meant I don't know
about skipping college.

Beverly: [sings] Laundry day, laundry day Make my baby's stains go away [gasps] Ooh!
Adam: Nothing! Studying! Respecting boundaries!
Beverly: What is going on here in the dark?
Adam: Brea, do you want to field this one?
Brea: I do not.
Beverly: And what is that funk? It's like I'm standing in a musky cloud.
Adam: Basements are damp.
Beverly: It's also hot. Like, steamy.
Brea: I think the dryer was on.
Adam: Brea on the board. The dryer. Likely culprit for everything you're smelling.
Beverly: Binaca. Vanilla-scented candle. Sade's classic booty groove The Sweetest Taboo. [gasps] You two were kissing!
Brea: Okay, I'm just gonna mosey on out of here.
Adam: No! We are not gonna be shamed by you. Basement kissing is a teen rite of passage. I demand you leave!

Adam: I have an important announcement. Brea's coming over to pick me up for our date, and I don't want to hear a peep out of any of you.
Murray: You're not gonna have to worry about that here.
Beverly: Where are you going? Niagara Falls? To a seedy motel to do your wicked business?
Adam: For your information, we're gonna go see a Eugene O'Neill play and grab a late supper.
Beverly: Is that why you're dressed like a boy professor?
Adam: While you may not recognize it, Mother, I'm a man, with manly tastes and desires. [Beverly scoffs] Ooh. My five-o'clock shadow is early. 'Scuse me. My lady likes me clean.

Adam: There's my Queen Bee.
Brea: Look. Your mom keeps bringing me loaves of banana bread. They are so heavy, they defy the laws of physics.
Adam: We have a theory. She uses a lot of bananas and some depleted uranium.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Brea and I had held hands, couple's skated, shared off-campus lunches, and went for ice cream. But she was the most popular girl in school, and I never quite knew where I stood. What I did know was I was about to ask her to prom.
Adam: Hey, Brea...
Brea: Let's go to prom.
Adam: You're asking me? Tables turned! Women can do it! Working Girl. Melanie Griffith. Sexy, but competent. Let the River Run.
Brea: Is there a yes in there?
Adam: Yes! A thousand times yes!
Brea: I'm so excited!

Adult Adam: [v.o.] And while the moments that followed might not have happened exactly this way, here's what it felt like.
[Adam dances down the hallway as Wham's "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" plays]
Sydney: Don't touch me, freak!
Adam: With pleasure.
Johnny: Give me your lunch, Goldnerd.
Adam: It's my mom's meatloaf on pumpernickel. You're in for a treat. Three, two... Basketball.
JC Spink: That's my dad's ball. I'm not supposed to get trash on it!
[As Adam dances by the lunchtables outside, he grabs somebody's drink and throws it]
Girl: [o.s.] Hey!
[Adam dances into the gym as the cheerleaders practice]
Coach: Let's go, girls! Five, six, seven, eight!
Cheerleader: Who's the short-haired girl?
Adam: It's me! Go Quakers!
[Adam dances into his class and signs a girl's cast]
Girl #2: Hey! I don't even know who you are.
Adam: Read your arm!
Mr. Woodburn: Goldberg, stop dancing to your inner soundtrack!
Adam: Dance with me!
Mr. Woodburn: This isn't infectious! Get off me!
[As Mr. Woodburn pushes Adam out into the hallway, Beverly catches him]
Beverly: Oh!
Adam: Mom! What are you doing here?
Beverly: After last week, you probably need a new pair of rescue underwear for your locker.
Adam: That's the worst thing I've ever heard, but I don't care! Jitterbug!

Adam: You got my [bleep] prom cancelled?
Beverly: It's not a complete loss. They did replace it with...
Adam: "The Egalitarian Quaker Gathering of Friends"? What the hell even is that?
Beverly: It is exactly like a prom, except there's no dates or music, and it's in the late afternoon.
Adam: That's a school assembly! Like when McGruff the Crime Dog came to talk about safety, but wouldn't stop frisking me.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] It's easy to get in our own heads, but then you remember that the best thing you can do for the people you love is just show up. The thing is, life isn't about who we think we're supposed to be or how we're supposed to act. It's about allowing the people we love to bring out the best in us.
Geoff: It's late.
Erica: I'm not going anywhere.
Adult Adam: [v.o.] From life's toughest moments... to the sweetest ones... life can be pretty in any color. Yep, as time goes by, the details get fuzzy, but one thing's never been clearer... It was 1980-something, and it was awesome.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] Back in the '80s, Airplane! was the pinnacle sky-high spoof. It was packed with so many laughs, gags, and puns, you couldn't keep up. And guess who knew it line-by-line.
Adam: Surely, you can't be serious.
Leslie Nielsen: [on TV] I am serious. And don't call me Shirley.
Adam: It's an adverb, but he thinks it's a ladies' name! It can't get any better!
Brea: Look how happy this movie makes you. It's so cute.
Adam: You're the cute one. If you were a board game, you'd be Cutes N' Ladders.
Brea: If you were a cereal, you'd be Cutie Pebbles.
Adam: If you were a mathematician, you'd be Sir Isaac Cute-on.

Adam: Yes! I get to do Airplane! bits on an actual airplane! "Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue." [chuckles] That's one of them.