Carlton Quote #457

Quote from Carlton in Cold Feet, Hot Body

Will: Carlton, the customers are complaining there ain't no bacon in the BLT's.
Carlton: Well, where's the law that says the B has to stand for bacon? Read the damn sign.
Will: Bread, lettuce and tomato?
Carlton: Well, we had to cut back somewhere. Last month, our outlay exceeded our revenues. But I don't expect you to understand that.
Denise: Ahem. Excuse me. Can I ask you a question?
Will: Excuse me, Carlton, but a beautiful woman wants to talk to me. [mimics Carlton] But I don't expect you to understand that.

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 ‘Cold Feet, Hot Body’ Quotes

Quote from Will

Will: Come on, Uncle Phil. Look, you know I love Lisa. I wanna be with her 24/7, you know?
Philip: Yeah, well, I'm with you so far.
Will: But every once in a while it's kind of like the Civil War. You know, the North got everything under control but every once in a while, it's a Southern uprising.
Philip: Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, I understand, see, but you have to remember that the North has right on its side so you better be damn sure that it wins the war.
Will: Uncle Phil, look, I'm trying, man but I got the feeling that the South shall rise again. And you know, I don't even know if it's fair to marry Lisa. You know, during wartime.

Quote from Philip

Philip: Now, okay? Now, we're walking. We're walking. Ooh... Beautiful woman walks right on by. Looks just Diahann Carroll.
Will: Ah. Phillip.
Philip: What, Vivian? I was looking at that woman. I mean, she's gorgeous, but she doesn't do a thing for me. Baby, what is it that you have that she doesn't?
Will: [high-pitched voice] A mean left hook.
Philip: Oh, come on.
Will: [normal voice] I apologize. I was just playing, Uncle Phil. You're right, I see your point.
Philip: Ain't that the truth. Now, but you don't push your luck because you're just a beginner. If Toni Braxton walked by, you just put on your sunglasses.
Will: Oh, man, I don't need none of that stuff. I got it completely under control. I don't care if Toni girl goes galloping by on a white horse buck-naked, you know what I'm saying? [mimics horse neighing] She better be traveling fast, though. Snatch her little butt down off there.

Quote from Ashley

Ashley: Will, Lisa, this is Kevin.
Will: Oh, hey. Kev, what's up, man?
Kevin: Uh, I don't know.
Ashley: [to Will] Hey, you're not exactly splitting atoms either, okay?