‘It's Better to Have Loved and Lost It...’
Season 4, Episode 5 - Aired October 11, 1993
After Will teases Carlton about being a virgin, he meets a woman he is sure is Miss Right.
Quote from Will
Will: Yo, man, I remember my first time. Right before I came out here from Philly. Um, Miss X gave me an unforgettable going-away present.
Carlton: What was it?
Will: A key chain, Carlton. What do you think, man? Look, all I'm saying is she was very special and this true mack here was solid gold.
Quote from Jazz
Duane: Carlton, you've been mighty quiet over there about this here subject.
Jazz: Maybe he ain't got nothing to talk about.
Duane: Lockjaw.
Carlton: I thought we were here to play poker.
Jazz: I think he's more used to playing solitaire.
Duane: Solitaire!
Will: Oh, oh, oh. I guess y'all don't know. The only problem this stallion has is keeping the names with the faces if you know what I'm saying. You know, Carlton, tell them about the time. Tell them about the time.
Carlton: Not that it's anybody's business, but my first time will be a loving expression of my commitment to the girl of my dreams.
Jazz: That's beautiful, Carlton. I call. Check it out. Three kings... and a virgin.
Quote from Will
Carlton: Hey, Will.
Will: Hey, what you doing here?
Carlton: I'm here to sign up for the reception. The dean of the business school's a Princeton alum. You know what that means.
Will: Yeah, you'll be kissing more butt than Arsenio.
Quote from Will
Carlton: Look, Dean Morgan could be my ticket into Princeton. Kissing up is a small price to pay.
Will: Well, you know what? Just try not to embarrass yourself... again.
Carlton: What's that supposed to mean?
Will: Last night, Carlton. I mean, this innocence thing. In high school, that was cute. But come on, you're a man now. Start lying.
Carlton: Why? I have nothing to be embarrassed about. I'm waiting for Miss Right.
Will: Carlton, please, forget about Miss Right. Go for Miss Right Now.
Quote from Carlton
Carlton: So you're a Princeton fan?
Joann: Not really. But my favorite singer is performing the national anthem.
Carlton: Who's that?
Joann: Tom Jones.
[Love Is a Many-Splendored Thing plays while Carlton longs longingly into the air]
Quote from Geoffrey
Philip: [on the phone] Bob, Bob. Bob, calm down. Bob, judges don't cry. Bob, this is just an investigation. Everything's gonna work out fine. Trust me. Okay, bye. Yeah. Bye, bye. [hangs up] He's dead.
Will: What's going on, Uncle Phil?
Philip: Oh, that ethics committee is digging up dirt on every judge in town. It's a witch-hunt, man. A witch-hunt.
Geoffrey: [drops a glass] Goodness. Clumsy me.
Vivian: Philip, I thought you were getting the car. What's going on?
Philip: Oh, that committee nailed another judge. I sure am glad we don't have anything to hide. Will?
Will: Hey, look. I found that Chevette. The body was already in the trunk too.
Vivian: Honey, come on, we're gonna be late for the party.
Philip: I am serious, Will. You stay out of trouble. The slightest indiscretion could cost me my job. [Geoffrey drops another glass]
Quote from Carlton
Joann: That was the most romantic afternoon I've ever had.
Carlton: I knew you'd love the Tom Jones Museum. I'm sorry we didn't make it to the Hall of Sideburns.
Joann: Here we are.
Carlton: Do you live in this hotel?
Joann: Oh, just until I find a new apartment.
Carlton: You could come live at our house. My little sister is almost 15. It's time she moved out on her own.
Quote from Hilary
Vivian: Geoffrey has something to tell us.
Will: Hurry up, G. I'm late for work, man.
Geoffrey: I have a confession. Something so shameful, I had hoped it could remain buried forever.
Will: Oh, I think I got a minute or two for this one.
Philip: I hope this doesn't have anything to do with the ethics committee investigation.
Geoffrey: I'm afraid it does, sir. I beg your forgiveness for bringing this pox upon your house.
Hilary: That's all right, just don't take another morning off.
Quote from Carlton
Carlton: Excuse me, Dean Morgan? Carlton Banks, class of '97. I read your paper on the rise and fall of IBM. I call it the feel-good financial analysis of the year.
Will: Let the butt-kissing begin.
Dean Morgan: Yeah, Banks, Banks. Yes, you're the chap who wants to transfer to Princeton. That's my alma mater, you know.
Carlton: Really? Well, quelle surprise.
Dean Morgan: Do you know what it takes to be accepted into Princeton, Mr. Banks? Inspiration. And one phone call from me. [laughs]
Carlton: Oh, this must be fate. Man, I had my inspiration yesterday. I found a woman who makes me believe that anything is possible.
Dean Morgan: Well, I feel the same way about Mrs. Morgan. Ah, here she is now. Sweetheart. Carlton Banks, I'd like you to meet my wife, Joann.
Quote from Carlton
Carlton: Why didn't you tell me you were married?
Joann: It's not that simple.
Carlton: You're telling me. I mean, this will make it very hard for us.
Joann: Carlton, there is no us. My husband and I are separated but he called this morning and we're trying to work things out.
Carlton: But yesterday-
Joann: No, I was upset. And you were so cute. Well, you made me feel better. Look, I'm not proud of myself.
Carlton: I love you.
Joann: Oh, Carlton. It was just one night.
Carlton: I've been waiting my whole life for that one night.
Joann: I'm so sorry.
Carlton: So what happens now?
Joann: We say goodbye.