Hilary: Evander.
Evander Holyfield: Hilary.
Will: You know her?
Evander Holyfield: [kisses Hilary] Where were you last night at Bruce Willis' party?
Hilary: [scoffs] I'm not speaking to Bruce. I'll tell you about it later.
[Will gives a surprised look to camera and shrugs his shoulders]
Hilary: Anyway, what are you doing here?
Evander Holyfield: I didn't know you lived here. Frankly, I saw the lights and I thought they were a little tacky.

Will: Carlton, we got a problem. Your sister, 10 years old and doesn't know the meaning of Christmas.
Ashley: I know the meaning of "undulate."

Carlton: I don't know where this Christmas thing's going, but I've got bigger fish to fry. I've got to raise $600 more for my Glee Club ski trip.
Will: Give you $1 if you shave your head.
Carlton: I've booked the Alligaroos to sing at a bunch of Christmas parties. So if we make enough money, on December 26 we'll all be. [mimes skiing]
Will: Imitating Jerry Lewis?

Will: Hold it! What the bloody hell kind of song is that?
Carlton: What do you mean?
Will: A little kid sees his mom tongue-wrestling with Santa Claus?
Carlton: Will, it's really his father dressed up like Santa Claus.
Will: Oh. Well, why'd he dress up like... Oh, oh, oh, I get it. I dress up like Santa Claus. You dress up like the Easter Bunny. That makes me sick.

Chadney: We're putting together a program for Jonathan's parents' party tonight.
Kellogg: Jonathan's stepfather is a record producer and he asked us not to do tired old Christmas carols. Here's our program.
Will: Wait a minute. "You Don't Bring Me Flowers", "People Who Need People", "The Way We Were". Who'll come down the chimney, Barbra Streisand?
Jonathan: You've been to my parents' parties?

Will: Hold up, Aunt Viv, does this neighborhood do anything special for Christmas?
Vivian: Not really. Well, last year, President Reagan's Secret Service agents dressed up as Santa and warned everyone to keep their distance. That was kind of festive.

Vivian: Look, if you want to show Ashley a little more of the Christmas spirit why don't you go to the shop, pick up the decorations and then you and Ashley can decorate it yourself, okay?
Will: Well, all right, then. [shouts] Ashley, this is going to be hype. And you have fun at the office Christmas party.
Vivian: Thanks, I'm looking forward to meeting all the new wives. I hope they bring their Barbie dolls.

Ashley: Will, were you vociferating for me?
Will: I got to get back to you on that. But anyway, you want to go to Beverly Hills with me and get the decorations?
Ashley: Okay.
Will: And we can sing Christmas songs all the way.
Ashley: Great. Here's one Carlton taught me. [sings] Scattered pictures Of the smiles we left behind

Ashley: Hi.
Will: Merry Christmas.
Vic: Mmm-hmm. Aren't these figures outstanding? They're beyond outstanding, they're deeply beyond. They're hand-carved. We import them from Poland.
Will: We're looking for some Christmas decorations.
Vic: Let me show you something that we're doing now that's deeply happening. It's a Caribbean Christmas tree. It's very big in London, it's beyond big. It's all about very hot oranges and very intense yellows. I feel it's a very vibrant tree, and I feel it's a very important tree.
Ashley: Well, we're just picking up the decorations for my mother, Mrs. Banks.
Vic: Yeah, she phoned and told me you'd be putting them up yourselves this year, which is fine. You'll save yourself a little money, which is a good thing because the '90s are going to be all about restraint.

Vivian: We should have left that stupid office party an hour earlier. I still have 30 papers to grade.
Philip: Well, we're both busy, but we can't work in the car so why don't we just take this time to relax a bit?
Vivian: You're right. Oh, look how nicely they decorated the house on the corner.
Philip: Those white lights on the tree outside.
Vivian: Just the right touch of lights. A little goes a long way, you know.
Philip: God, I used to love Christmas when I was little. Now it just rushes by in one big blur.
Vivian: Hmm. Well, Christmas is more for kids. You know, even though we're busy I think we should do something nice for Will. Must be hard for him spending Christmas in a strange place.
Philip: Oh, yeah, you're right, sweetheart. We'll do something nice for him.
[As Phil and Vivian pull up on their drive way, they see the house is decked out in lights with giant inflatable candles, reindeer, snowmen and Santa Clauses]