‘Day Damn One’
Season 1, Episode 14 - Aired December 3, 1990
Will entertains Ashley's slumber party with a scary tale of his first day at Bel-Air Academy.
Quote from Will
[flashback:]
Simon: Probation is not enough. If Smith isn't expelled, it will be an invitation to anarchy.
Mr. Fellows: I have to say that I am appalled at this tribunal's lack of sensitivity.
Will: Speak on, bro.
Mr. Fellows: We can't judge Will Smith by our standards. He doesn't even speak our language. Where he grew up, the word "bad" means "good." Doesn't that say it all? [raises fist] Fight the power.
Quote from Will
[flashback:]
Headmaster: Will, do you have anything to say?
Will: Yeah. Well, I didn't think y'all was gonna get so mad for me writing my name on an old desk. I mean, I'd never write my name on a new desk. That's vandalism. But see, those guys, they carved their name in a new desk. They got their picture on the wall.
Headmaster: Well, that's totally different. They carved their names so people would remember them as part of the school.
Will: That's why I did it.
Simon: That's ridiculous. You're trying to ruin our school.
Kellogg: No, he isn't.
Headmaster: Lieberbaum, you're out of order.
Kellogg: But he's not ruining the school. He's making it better.
Student: Word up, Cornflake.
Kellogg: I don't mean to dis you guys but if Will's expelled, I'm leaving, too and I'm taking my dad's checkbook with me. [all chant] Free Will!
Quote from Carlton
[flashback:]
Carlton: Will, before I go to bed, I just want to say I was proud of you tonight, old sport. Kudos. You took your punishment like a man.
Will: That's all you got to say?
Carlton: Good night?
Will: Carlton, you Five-Oed me, man.
Carlton: Excuse me?
Will: You dimed me out.
Carlton: Pardon?
Will: You tattled on me, all right?
Carlton: I did it for your own good. You weren't going to tell.
Will: How do you know? You didn't give me a chance. You're not worried about my own good. You're just worried about yourself.
Carlton: It may seem like that to you now, but one day, you will-
Will: Oh, Carlton, shut up! Man, I know what this is about. You thought you were this big hotshot at school and I was gonna be your little charity case, but I took your juice.
Quote from Will
Will: Picture this if you will my man Wilbert in a kitchen with a hair net on his head. If that's not a scary thought, I don't know what is. Alright, so look, you all gotta do me a favor. Raise your right hand. I want your solemn promise that if any of you ever meets Wilbert Smithsonian, you won't tell him I told you this story, okay? Swear?
Sasha: I swear, Wilbert Smithsonian.
Ashley: Will's cold busted.
[As the girls laugh, Will starts a pillow fight]