Philip: What do you hope to accomplish by strapping a bomb to your chest and blowing up a gas station?
Juggles: [chuckles] I'm on my way down to one of the networks and I'm gonna make them put me on TV. And then the whole world is gonna see my talent to entertain.
Will: Um... Wouldn't it be easier to just get a agent?
Juggles: I had an agent and then he had my wife. [nervous silence] That's a joke!
Philip: There's gotta be a better way.
Juggles: Yeah, well, I tried all the other ways, but it's always Bozo this or Coco that. Never any jobs for Juggles, oh, no. And I'll tell you another thing, I could've sold twice as many hamburgers as that Ronald guy. That no-act clown. No. No. Nobody wants to give Juggles a chance. Mm-mm. One little tent fire. One little elephant stampede. A couple of kids end up in the hospital and, all of a sudden, Juggles is poison. As if they even saw me smoking that cigar. It's harassment, I tell you!
Will: Well, you're probably in a hurry to get down to that network, you know. So don't let us stop you. Grab your little seltzer bottle, hop in your little miniature car. If you go right now, you could probably beat rush hour.
Juggles: No! No, no, no. Oh, no. Now that I got myself a big celebrity judge hostage I'm gonna make the network people come here. [chuckles] I'll be a bigger celebrity than I even thought.