‘The Transporter Malfunction’ Quotes

520. The Transporter Malfunction
Aired March 29, 2012
When Penny buys Leonard and Sheldon "Star Trek" collectibles, Sheldon listens to his "Inner Spock" and breaks his toy. Meanwhile, Raj believes he's found his future wife when he asks his parents to set him on a date.
Quote from Penny
Leonard: Once you open the box it loses its value.
Penny: Yeah, yeah. My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity. I gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: I thought where you come from they don't have emotions.
Spock Doll: I come from a factory in Taiwan.
Quote from Penny
Leonard: You went to the comic book store by yourself?
Penny: Yeah, it was fun. I walked in and two different guys got asthma attacks. It felt pretty good.
Quote from Sheldon
Penny: What is the truth?
Sheldon: My Mr. Spock doll came to me in a dream and forced me to open it. And when the toy broke I switched it for yours. Later, he encouraged me to do the right thing and I defied him. And then I was attacked by a Gorn.
Leonard: Okay, that I believe.
Quote from Raj
Raj: No, I'm not gay. If anything, I'm metrosexual.
Dr. Koothrappali: What's that?
Raj: It means that I like women, as well as their skin-care products.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: 50% of marriages end in divorce, but 100% of sundae bars end in happiness.
Quote from Bernadette
Raj: Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
Bernadette: Metrosexual, my ass.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Yeah, I hate wedding receptions. I wish the bride and groom would take a cue from Bilbo Baggins. Slip on the ring, disappear and everyone goes home.
Quote from Sheldon
Spock Doll: What is the purpose of a toy?
Sheldon: To be played with.
Spock Doll: Therefore to not play with it would be...?
Sheldon: Illogical. Damn it, Spock, you're right.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: I love astro-physics. It's like looking at the universe naked.
Quote from Raj
Raj: Oh, my goodness. Aren't you the cutest little Yorkie ever! You got him for me?
Howard: Her. We thought you two would hit it off.
Raj: I think we already have.