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‘The Occupation Recalibration’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

The Big Bang Theory: The Occupation Recalibration

713. The Occupation Recalibration

Aired January 9, 2014

Sheldon struggles to relax when the university forces him to use his vacation time. Meanwhile, Leonard tries to support Penny after she decides to quit her job, and Bernadette needs Stuart's help when she accidentally destroys one of Howard's comic books.

Quote from Bernadette

Jesse: You're back.
Bernadette: *Angry voice* Yes, I am. There's a few more things I want to say to you. Stuart's store is just fine. And he's a much nicer person than you are. And if you still have that comic I'd like to buy it right now.
Jesse: No problem. Want a latte while you wait?
Bernadette: No, I don't want a latte. I want a cappuccino and a blueberry scone.
Jesse: I only have chocolate chip.
Bernadette: Well that sounds even better!

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Quote from Stuart

Bernadette: Hey, Stuart.
Stuart: *startled* Hey.
Bernadette: Sorry, did I startle you?
Stuart: Yes, but at this point pretty much any customer does.

Quote from Penny

Penny: Thank you, I needed to hear that. Why can't Leonard understand it?
Sheldon: Because he's not like us, Penny. We're dreamers!
Penny: Yeah, I need to start cracking the window when I leave you in the car.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Where's my lemonade?
Penny: I didn't get it.
Sheldon: A fitting swan song to your career as a waitress to forget my order one last time.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Come on, take me to work with you.
Leonard: No, you're on vacation.
Sheldon: Please! What if there's a big break through in science today and I'm not there to see it?
Leonard: You really think there's going to be a breakthrough without you to do it?
Sheldon: No. I was just tricking you.

Quote from Stuart

Bernadette: I accidentally destroyed one of Howard's comic books this morning and I was hoping I could replace it.
Stuart: What happened?
Bernadette: Batman got his ass kicked by my curling iron.
Stuart: Don't let the Riddler know that. It's a comic book joke.
*Bernadette stares blankly*
Stuart: Or maybe it's not.

Quote from Raj

Howard: You know if you'd rather skip lunch and hang out with your boyfriend, Bert. It's totally okay.
Amy: He's not my boyfriend.
Raj: Are you sure? He's tall, pale and awkward. That sounds like your type.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: How did she get you to do yoga?
Sheldon: Well, to be honest I thought she said Yoda.

Quote from Stuart

Stuart: You know something, Jesse. You may have a successful business and the kind of pink complexion that comes with good nutrition, but I have something more important.
Jesse: What's that?
Stuart: Friendship ... which I would trade in a heartbeat for all this.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm going to go inside, put on my cosiest pajamas, curl up with a good book and wait for this nightmare to be over.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I've read that there are great yogis who have such mastery over their bodies that they can draw water in through their genitals.
Penny: Yeah, well I don't think we're gonna get to do that today.
Sheldon: Too bad. It seems like a good way to drink a milkshake without getting brain freeze.

Quote from Raj

Amy: (To Raj) Should somebody as lonely as you really be making fun of me?
Raj: Yeah, grow up, Howard! God.

Quote from Amy

Amy: That's very nice, but I have a boyfriend.
Bert: That's what they all say. You just don't want to go out with me because I have an off-putting personality.
Amy: No, that's not true. My boyfriend has an off-putting personality, too. Like way worse than you.

Quote from Raj

Amy: So what am I supposed to do now?
Raj: Prepare your uterus for his gigantic offspring?

Quote from Amy

Howard: Anybody home?
Amy: Hey. What brings you guys here?
Raj: We were just on our way to lunch and wanted to see if you'd like to join us.
Amy: Why? Because Sheldon's not here this week and you don't think I have any other options -- I'm just kidding! I'll get my purse.

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