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‘The Lizard-Spock Expansion’ Quotes

The Big Bang Theory: The Lizard-Spock Expansion

208. The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Aired November 17, 2008

A smitten Wolowitz thinks he has found the love of his life, until she finds herself more interested in Leonard.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes scissors.

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Quote from Leonard

Stephanie: So, how was your day?
Leonard: You know, I'm a physicist, I thought about stuff.
Stephanie: That's it?
Leonard: I wrote some of it down.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm sorry but I'm not going to watch the Clone Wars TV Series until I've seen the Clone Wars movie. I prefer to let George Lucas disappoint me in the order he intended.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I believe the appropriate metaphor here involves a river of excrement and a Native American water vessel without any means of propulsion.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Rock - Paper - Scissors - Lizard - Spock

Quote from Raj

Leonard: How can 5 not be worse than 1?
Raj: Yeah, Star Trek 5 worse than 1.
Sheldon: Okay, first of all that is a comparison of quality not intensity. Secondly, Star Trek 1 is orders of magnitude worse than Star Trek 5.
Raj: Are you joking? Star Trek 5 is the standard against which all badness is measured.

Quote from Howard

Howard: Mock me if you will, but it works. You show up at a club in something distinctive, scope out your target and toss out some negs.
Raj: What are negs?
Howard: A neg is a negative compliment that throws a pretty woman off her game. Like "Normally, I'm not turned on by big teeth, but on you, they work." I've got a whole list of em. Who wants to be my wingman?
Leonard: You're not gonna need wingman, you're gonna need a paramedic.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Doesn't anyone wanna know where he's going?
Penny: Okay, where is he going?
Sheldon: Leonard is going to the office.

Quote from Howard

Howard: May I say Penny, not a lot of women could look as hot as you do with such greasy hair.

Quote from Sheldon

Howard: There must be another way.
Raj: You could try calling AAA. But based on NASA's latest timetable, they wouldn't be out there for another 35 years.
Sheldon: Plus, I understand you need to be standing next to the vehicle with your card when they arrive.

Quote from Raj

Sheldon: Oh look, Saturn 3 is on.
Raj: I don't want to watch Saturn 3. Deep Space Nine is better.
Sheldon: How is Deep Space Nine better than Saturn 3?
Raj: Simple subtraction will tell you its six better.

Quote from Howard

Howard: I got the Mars-rover stuck in the ditch.
Sheldon: Where?
Howard: On a dusty highway just outside Bakersfield. Where do you think?! On Mars!

Quote from Howard

Howard: Kind of a "Mars rover, Mars rover, can Howard come over?" situation.

Quote from Sheldon

Rajesh: Oh,snap.
Sheldon: Snap what?

Quote from Raj

Sheldon: Will you at least stipulate that Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home is inarguably the best?
Raj: I have 3 words for you: Wrath of Khan.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Just out of curiosity, did he ever have a shot with you?
Stephanie: Are you insane, the guy was wearing an eyepatch.
Leonard: So, then why did you--
Stephanie: He said I could drive a car on Mars!


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