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‘The Deception Verification’ Quotes

The Big Bang Theory: The Deception Verification

702. The Deception Verification

Aired September 26, 2013

Sheldon is distraught when Leonard returns from his expedition early but doesn't tell him. Meanwhile, Howard's close relationship with his mother causes his masculinity to be called into question.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Careful, Amy. The friend of the enemy's girlfriend is my enemy.
Amy: Really?
Sheldon: You're either with me or against me.
Amy: You wanna take the bus to work?
Sheldon: Maybe there's a third option.

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Quote from Amy

Amy: What does tweepodoc mean?
Sheldon: Elephant?
Amy: Lucky guess.

Quote from Penny

Sheldon: Please don't take my looking forward to Leonard coming home as criticism of you in his absence. That criticism will come later in your report card.
Penny: Yeah, I didn't stay for the detention. I'm not going to read the report card.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: That's curious. If there's no one here, why are there two glasses of wine on the table?
Penny: Oh, well you know. I've got two hands and a bit of a drinking prolbem.
Sheldon: Of course. Ask a silly question.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Leonard: I didn't make it back. The ship sank. I'm in Hell.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Penny, it's your lucky day. Three of these eggs are clearly not jumbo size. Grab your keys!

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Stuart, I was wondering if you can help me find something.
Stuart: Happy to, unless it's hope or a reason to live?
Sheldon: Oh, you make me laugh, sad clown.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Aquaman? This isn't a gag gift, Stuart.

Quote from Leonard

Sheldon: No I should apologize. I never realized to what extent our friendship was a burden to you.
Leonard: That is not fair. I complain about what a burden it is at least once a month.
Sheldon: No, no, no. Let's not sugarcoat this. You find me finnicky, pedantic and annoying.
Penny: No, he doesn't.
Leonard: I have actually used those exact words before. In that order.

Quote from Howard

Howard: I'm definitely up a cup size.
Raj: Yeah, but they're firm. So you've got that going for you.
Howard: Thanks, I needed that today.

Quote from Raj

Howard: This man (Raj), held my breast the other day and I love him for it.
Raj: A little loud, dude.

Quote from Penny

Leonard: Since when can Koothrappali talk in front of the girls without a beer?
Bernadette: Oh, it happened just after you left.
Leonard: And no one told me?
Howard: (Emotionally) I can't believe we forgot to tell him.
Penny: *Hands Howard the Vagisil coupon* Think of Sheldon when you apply it.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I let you buy feminine hygiene products with my supermarket clubcard. Do you have any idea the kind of coupons I'm going to get in the mail now?

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: Howie, the estrogen is getting absorbed by your skin. That's why you've been all bloated, moody and a giant pain in the ass.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: I'm going to hit the head. That's what us salty sea dogs say when we have to go pee-pee.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: You say you're from New Jersey, but how do I know?
Leonard: Who would lie about being from New Jersey?

Quote from Amy

Amy: FYI, I had a donut for breakfast, you jerk.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm quite familiar with plumbing. Not to brag, but I spent most of fifth grade with my head in a toilet.


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