Penny: Well, then why don't you come over next Saturday and watch the game with us?
Leonard: Another football game?
Penny: They have them every week.
Leonard: Did not know that.
Leonard: Sure, sure, just I don't know much about football.
Penny: Oh, that's okay. A lot of the guys' girlfriends don't know football. They just kind of drink and talk in the kitchen.
Leonard: Great.

Leonard: What would you be if you were attached to another object by an inclined plane, wrapped helically around an axis?
Sheldon: Screwed?
Leonard: There you go.

Sheldon: This song is never going to stop. Have you ever dealt with something so relentlessly irritating?
Leonard: That's a trick question, right?

Leonard: Penny, as a scientist, my job is to figure out why things happen. But I don't think I'll ever understand how someone like me could get to be with someone like you. You know maybe I don't need to understand it, I just need to be grateful. I love you, Penny.

Leonard: I think I'm starting to get this.
Rajesh: Really? The only thing I've learnt in the last 2 hours is that American men drink a lot of beer, pee too often and have trouble getting erections.
Leonard: Focus on the game, not the commercials Raj.

Howard: Sheldon knows football? I mean Quidditch, sure, but football?

Sheldon: I grew up in Texas. Football is ubiquitous in Texas. Pro football, college football, high school football, pee wee football - in fact, every form of football except the original, European football, which most Texans believe to be a commie plot.