Howard: If there's a chance someone's gonna see you naked, it's also polite to make sure you're well-groomed down there.
Bernadette: I get it, Howard. I've been busy!

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Bernadette: Maybe we should get one of those machines to help her up the stairs.
Howard: You mean a forklift?

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Stuart: Do you still want to go out with me?
Denise: Absolutely. Hey, maybe we can go find Nemo together.
Stuart: That's a good one.
Denise: Do your 63 other crayon friends know you're out?
Stuart: Are you just gonna make fun of me all night?
Denise: Probably.
Stuart: Great. So what are we thinking, Chinese?
Denise: Yeah, I'm in the mood for orange chicken.

Amy: Well, Leonard and Penny are our best friends. They know us better than anyone. They said it's the perfect gift. We must be missing something. You don't think it's a marital aid, do you?
Sheldon: Don't be silly. Amy, how is this big glass shaft going to aid our marriage?

Sheldon: Now, do you know what Leonard and Penny got us for our wedding gift?
Howard: Well-
Sheldon: Don't answer. I don't want to know. I just want to know if you know.
Howard: I do know.
Sheldon: Okay, great. I believe that Amy and I have figured it out. Is it a clue to a scavenger hunt that will lead us to the actual present?
Howard: If you're asking if you and Amy should spend the next couple days running all over town searching for the next clue, I'm gonna have to say yes.
Sheldon: I knew it! This is so much fun.
Howard: Oh, it really is.