[Red, Kitty and Eric sit at the kitchen table in awkward silence]
Kitty: Well, that was a nice twenty minutes of silence. Who wants a little kick in their coffee? I know I do.
Donna: [enters] [to Red] You're the dumbass! [runs off]

Donna: Why did you tell him? We had it all planned. We were gonna give them wine, get 'em all loose and juiced. But you spilled the beans.
Fez: Good, because wine and beans is not a good combo. Hey. Toot-toot, if you know what I mean.

Kelso: Sorry I'm late. I was cutting through backyards on the way over here and the Hendersons got a new jungle gym. Whoa. They're still yelling?
Eric: Yeah. I'm trying to read Red's lips, but I can't make it out. He keeps calling me a "stupid duck." [snaps fingers] Ah!
Kelso: Hey, I'll go spy on them. I just gotta run home real quick and change into my ninja outfit.
Eric: I don't think this situation calls for camouflage, Kelso.
Kelso: Well, that doesn't mean it's not fun to wear, Eric.

Red: But they're just too young to get married. How are they gonna live on their own? Eric jumps a foot every time the furnace kicks on.
Kitty: Exactly. He's not mature enough to get married. I'm still cutting the crusts off his sandwiches. Well, it's really more for me. He's my baby.

Kelso: [enters] Don't mind me. Feel free to keep talking. I'm just getting a soda. I'm not spying.
Bob: Hey, l-I don't like this engagement either but it's not like they can break it off.
Red: Why the hell not?
Bob: Well, it wouldn't be very romantic, for one.
Red: Oh, forget about it. I'll take care of this myself.
Kitty: No, no. Red, if you go out there and yell, you're just gonna drive him away.
Red: I'm sorry, Kitty, but yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy.
Kitty: Red. Red, I am putting my foot down. I forbid it.
Red: All right. Fine.
Bob: Wow! Red, I forbid you to-
Red: Shut up, Bob.
Kelso: Burn! [laughs]
Red: Get out!

Fez: Nina, you have such beautiful fingers. So long and elegant, like spider legs.
Nina: We can't do this here.
Fez: We can go to the backseat of the student-driver car. But I have to warn you, I have a hard time keeping my hands at 10:00 and 2:00.
Nina: Fez, this tension between us is causing problems. And here at the D.M.V., I've learned it's easier to solve problems when they're posed in a multiple-choice format. So, "A," we can further explore our relationship and hope that relieves the tension or, "B," I can fire you.
Fez: Is this some kind of trick?
Nina: It's not a trick.
Fez: Hmm, so it is a trick. I choose "B."
Nina: No, you choose "A". [kisses Fez]
Fez: Okay, I'll take "A." But I think you should throw a little "T" in there too.

Kitty: Dinner's ready, Eric.
Eric: You know what? Um, Dad's in there, so I'll just, you know, forage for berries.
Kitty: Look, I am not happy about this situation either, but I am in there making the best of it, not out here diddling a basketball.
Eric: Mom, if I was out here diddling a basketball this would be a very different conversation.
Kitty: Get in there.

Kitty: Well, look who I found. Our son. Who we love very much.
Eric: Hey, Dad.
Red: Pass the peas, Steven.
Kitty: Red, your son spoke to you.
Red: I heard him. But you asked me not to yell at him, and I agreed. So I'm just taking your idea and refining it.
Eric: Oh, so you're giving me the silent treatment?
Red: So, Steven, how was school today?
Hyde: Um, well, in health class today, we learned that an early engagement's often a sign of heavy drug use.
Eric: Hyde.
Kitty: Red, you're being a big baby.
Eric: No, Mom, it's okay. Actually, it's a pleasant surprise, but let's see how serious he is about it. Hey, Dad, you know who's got the right idea? Russia. [Red puts his utensils down]
Hyde: I haven't felt this kind of tension in years. Reminds me of home. Except everyone's wearing a shirt.

Fez: Nina, I think people at work are starting to notice there's something between us.
Nina: Well, it didn't help when you stood up at the staff meeting and said, "I want to do it with Nina."
Fez: Well, they asked if there was any unfinished business.
Nina: I think I've figured out a way to get rid of all this tension. You need to spend the night with me.
Fez: I'm all yours, boss lady. But you have to tell me where to stop now, because I have been burned in the past.
Nina: I don't want you to stop anywhere.
Fez: Oh. Oh! [they kiss] [singsongy] I'm going to do it! I'm going to do it!
Nina: Fez!
Fez: Sorry. I wrote this song about three years ago, and I finally get to use it.

Donna: Hey. How was work with Red?
Eric: It was terrible. I thought Red not talking to me would be cool. But today, instead of telling me to sweep the back room, he just threw a broom at me.
Donna: Well, what about if I talked to him? I mean, we've always gotten along. Maybe I can get through to him.
Eric: Donna, I'm not gonna make you fight my battles for me. I'm not gonna ask the woman that I love to do what I should do. But Red'll be home at about 5:30, so try to catch him before dinner, okay?