‘We're Not Gonna Take It’
Season 6, Episode 6 - Aired December 3, 2003
Eric loses his job at the dog food factory after Joanne breaks up with Bob. Meanwhile, Fez and Laurie receive a wedding gift just as Red pushes them to get a divorce.
Quote from Jackie
Bob: Guess what, girls. I got fudge.
Donna: Fudge? What a surprise! Who's it from?
Bob: It doesn't say, but there's a poem. "Roses are red. Violets are blue. Fudge is sweet. Here's some fudge."
Jackie: [whispers] Well, they rushed me.
Quote from Bob
Donna: I wonder who it's from, 'cause this sounds like someone likes you.
Bob: I hope it's a lady. [answers phone] Hello. Oh, hi, Joanne. It's Joanne. Really? Well, I think it's a little late to talk about getting back together. Turns out I'm very desirable. So I think this is good-bye. Oh, and I want my Barry White albums back... and my body paints. [hangs up]
Donna: Oh, my God.
Jackie: I know. They painted each other! Ugh!
Quote from Eric
Roy: Eric, you're first. I'm gonna test you on the skills every waiter should have.
Eric: Roy, I want you to know that because of my extensive background in crafts, I can fold a napkin into a rose, a swan and the rarely seen X-wing fighter.
Roy: Cool. Okay, I'm gonna place a difficult order. And you'll relay it to Steven in the kitchen. Here goes. I'll have the surf and turf, no seafood, meat... nice and pink, mashed potatoes not mashed, sliced into wedges and fried up.
Eric: Okay, so steak, medium rare and French fries. Okay, I'm gonna need a number 4, still kicking, hold the guppy and send it to France. And that is how you do that.
Quote from Red
Red: All right, everybody, only 12 signatures to the end of what I like to call "the shame."
Quote from Fez
Fez: It's still there. And it calls to me, like a box with something mysterious in it.
Kitty: There's nothing like a present wrapped in beautiful paper. It's like Cary Grant in a tuxedo. I just wanna rip it off!
Laurie: Don't touch it.
Fez: I'm not. I'm smelling it.
Kitty: Ooh! What does it smell like?
Fez: A box.
Quote from Kitty
Kitty: I hope it's a sewing machine.
Laurie: I hope it's a TV.
Fez: I hope it's a chocolate TV.
Kitty: There could be perishables in there. Oh, my God. What if it's a puppy? We have to open it.
Red: I don't care if Eric's in there. It's going back. Now let's get these signed.
Laurie: Look, right here. Paper's ripped.
Kitty: Oh, my gosh. You're right. Hmm. I see part of a word. "More." And under that, something "crow." "More crow." "More crow." It's a Kenmore microwave! [rips wrapping off] I win! I win!
Quote from Bob
Donna: Dad...
Bob: Too late. I finished it. So I was trying to figure out who sent me the fudge. And I thought, it could be the lady at the pharmacy, which is nice because she's seen my prescriptions, so we can skip that awkward conversation. Or it could be the mail lady.
Donna: Dad, I have to tell you something. Jackie and I sent you the fudge.
Bob: What?
Donna: Well, you seemed so sad, and we wanted to cheer you up. But then, we screwed up your chances for getting back together with Joanne, so...
Bob: So nobody likes me.
Jackie: We like you.
Bob: Eh.
Donna: We're really sorry, Dad.
Bob: Ah, I guess it's not so bad. I mean, I haven't thought about Joanne all day.
Donna: Well, if you want, we can all do something today. I can take you to the model train shop. Some of the tiny trees in Pinciotti town are looking pretty ratty.
Bob: No, I'm gonna go down and talk to the girl at the pharmacy. She's got a better keister than the mail lady. You'd think, with all that walking... Hey, guess you either got it or you don't. [chuckles]
Quote from Red
Red: Ah, what a beautiful morning. The birds are singing. The flowers are blooming. Divorce is in the air. Now let's finish this.
Kitty: Red, no one wants to get divorced on an empty stomach. [microwave dings] Ooh! And that's breakfast.
Red: You used the microwave.
Kitty: Red Forman, I firmly believe that God wants me to bake a potato in four minutes.
Red: No, God wants these two divorced and all evidence of their unholy union out of this house.
Quote from Red
Fez: Now you can have the saw, Red.
Red: No, I... [clears throat] That would be, uh, wrong.
Kitty: Well... It would be wrong if they were divorced, but if they stayed married, sending the gifts back would be rude.
Red: You make a good point.
Laurie: But I want a divorce.
Red: I'll tell you what, honey. We'll wait a month. If a riding mower hasn't shown up by then, we'll talk.
Quote from Kitty
Eric: So get this... I got fired. God, I never thought I'd say this, but apparently, I'm not good enough for the dog food factory.
Red: I thought you'd say that.
Kitty: Well, honey, don't worry. We'll get along fine without your paycheck. Instead of going to the movies, we'll watch TV. Instead of eating popcorn, we'll lick salt.