‘Water Tower’
Season 1, Episode 21 - Aired June 14, 1999
Kelso is injured when the gang spray paint a pot symbol on the town water tower. Meanwhile, Eric is traumatized after walking in on his parents having sex.
Quote from Hyde
Kelso: Hey, sorry about tonight, you guys.
Hyde: Sorry? Why? We got to watch you fall, man. I had a blast!
Quote from Eric
Hyde: Man, that is one drunk, slutty cheerleader.
Donna: There go her pom poms.
Eric: All right. All right, that is quite enough! Everywhere I look now it's sex, sex, sex. Well, it's disgusting and I, for one, will not have it in my basement!
Donna: Eric, what's wrong with you?
Eric: Oh, well, excuse me, Donna, for having a little moral fiber.
Quote from Jackie
Jackie: Well, I'm going to go check on Michael.
Hyde: Yeah, how's he doing?
Jackie: Oh, oh, oh. Yeah, like you care. Why don't you just apologize?
Hyde: Apologize for what?
Jackie: Well, if you don't know then obviously, you're a big, fat jerk. [exits]
Hyde: Okay, she's nuts.
Fez: I know. You are not fat.
Quote from Kelso
Kelso: Oh, hey, look, Jackie, it's my friends. Eric, Donna, and Fez. Yep, that's all my friends.
Hyde: Kelso, if you have something to say to me, why don't you just say it?
Kelso: Oh, no. Oh, no. I think you have something to say to me. And I'm gonna be right over here when you're ready.
Eric: All right, all right, this is stupid. Hyde, just apologize already.
Hyde: Forman, it's not my fault.
Donna: Well, whatever, he thinks it is.
Kelso: It is. You made me fall off the water tower.
Hyde: How? Did I push you?
Kelso: Well, no, but-
Hyde: Did I make the railing slippery?
Kelso: No.
Hyde: Then how is it my fault?
Kelso: Because... you didn't like my artwork. And you don't respect me, and you laugh at me and you're inconsiderate of my feelings.
Hyde: Kelso, no offense, but you sound like a chick.
Kelso: Wh- Man, I do!
Quote from Hyde
Hyde: Okay, all right. Do you remember that time when I was climbing your fence and I hit my forehead on that tree branch, and I fell into your yard and your dog Yogi came out of the house and bit me twice on the ass?
Kelso: [laughs] Yeah. You bled and you cried.
Hyde: I bled, I didn't cry.
Kelso: Yeah, you did. You bled and you cried.
Hyde: And you laughed, man. A lot. While I was bleeding. Do you see my point?
Kelso: Yeah. It's funny when friends get hurt.
Hyde: Close enough. Sorry.
Kelso: Hey, stop talking like a chick.
Jackie: God, you're both idiots.