415. Tornado Prom
Aired February 5, 2002
A tornado hits Point Place on the night of the Snow Prom, leaving most of the gang stuck in the school building. Unaware of the tornado and having forgotten to pick Donna up, Eric travels to the radio station to collect her. Meanwhile, Bob and his girlfriend Joanne take shelter with Red and Kitty in the Formans' basement.
Quote from Jackie
Jackie: Okay, look, you may not take this seriously, but I do. I used to be a rich, popular girl. But now that my dad has cut me off, I'm not rich so I have to be twice as popular.
Donna: Okay, maybe you should spend less time worrying about being popular and more time being thoughtful, friendly, considerate.
Jackie: Okay, can I get a translation because that was gibberish.
Quote from Bob
Kitty: Okay, you're right. Eric's fine. Let's just talk about something else. [laughs]
Bob: Ooh! You know, Joanne taught me a lot about lady orgasms. They've been around longer than I thought.
Kitty: Okay, so talking's bad.
Quote from Kitty
Kitty: Now, I'm just so worried about Eric. A tornado in January?
Red: Yeah, life's full of surprises. Like these two showing up 'cause they don't have a basement. Surprise!
Joanne: Gee, Red, you seem grouchy. Surprise!
Kitty: Red, if Eric gets caught in a tornado, he'll get blown to Canada. He's very light.
Quote from Eric
[circle in the radio station office:]
Donna: This is the best tornado ever!
Eric: I know! And who better to be stuck here with than America's most beloved rock band ladies and gentlemen, Aerosmith! [claps]
[The camera pans to a cardboard cut-out of Steven Tyler]
Eric: [as Steven Tyler] Hey, as rock legends, we've had some pretty good times. But it doesn't get any better than this. Hello, Wisconsin!
[The camera pans to a cardboard cut-out of Joe Perry]
Eric: [as Joe Perry] Yeah, I dig this joint too. Hello, Wisconsin.
Donna: That was your Aerosmith? You're bad at that. Steven Tyler is way cooler, and Joe Perry is so dreamy. God, you're bad at that!
Eric: What? That was dead-on! Right, guys?
[The cardboard cutouts' mouths appear to move]
Male Voice: [as Steven Tyler] I bought it. [exclaims]
Male Voice: [as Joe Perry] You, uh, really think I'm dreamy? [winks]
Donna: Whoa. The station manager's stuff is way better than ours.
Quote from Kelso
Kelso: Hey, guys. It is literally a million degrees out. I'm wearing shorts in January! Have you ever seen prettier legs on a fella?
Jackie: Michael, we'll admire your legs later. Snow Prom is tomorrow. We need to keep up our campaign for Snow Queen and Snow King.
Kelso: Jackie, I did campaign. I wrote our names all over the place.
Eric: Kelso, you peed in the snow.
Kelso: In cursive! It was awesome.
Quote from Fez
Eric: Whoa. Whoa. Hyde, you're going to a school dance? You're going to stink bomb the teachers' lounge, aren't you? I want in.
Hyde: No, man, kid stuff. See, during the dance, I'm going to throw a party in Coach Ferguson's office. I'm bringing my best stuff.
Fez: A party with your best stuff? Are you saying what I think you're saying?
Hyde: You know it.
Fez: Oh, boy, you have a pinata?
Quote from Fez
Rhonda: Oh, my God, Fez! A tornado? This changes everything. This could be our last night here on earth.
Fez: Oh, no. I'm going to die a virgin.
Rhonda: Not if I have anything to say about it.
Fez: You can talk all you want, but there's a tornado coming.
Rhonda: Fez, I mean, let's do it.
Fez: It? "It" it? All right. [runs off then returns] I'm going to need you.
Quote from Eric
Donna: Eric, you're here.
Eric: Donna, look, I'm sorry I'm late. I really did want to pick you up before the dance. So it's no big deal, really.
Donna: No big deal? It's a huge deal. I was in back filing records, and suddenly everyone was gone, and I was stuck here alone. And you risked the tornado for me.
Eric: Tornado? What tornado... could stop me from helping you? So, uh, tell me, um, is the tornado, like, um... like, out there?
Donna: Yeah. They say it's a biggie.
Donna: Eric, are you okay?
Eric: Sure. Uh, it's just that now that I know you're okay, I can finally start worrying about me. And, see, the thing about me is... [lights go out] I don't want to die.
Quote from Eric
Eric: So, what to do? Let's see, there's you, there's me, candlelight. You know, back in the old days we would have-
Donna: We're not doing that.
Eric: Uh-huh, yeah, yeah. So quick to dismiss the thing you once ached for.
Donna: You mean, cheese sticks?
Eric: If you want to call it that, sure.
Quote from Red
[Kitty is dancing as she and Red, Bob and Joanne play charades]
Red: [stammering] Gyrating. Uh, twisting. Uh... Hips! You make me feel like hips!
Bob: Uh, time. We win.
Kitty: I was dancing! "You make me feel like hips"?
Red: It could have been a song.
Joanne: Is it hard to lose, Red? 'Cause you make it look so easy.