Red: [inner monologue] Hi. Red Forman. Experienced, loyal, hard-working. Yeah.
[Red walks into the waiting room and sees a bunch of middle-aged men in suits just like him]
All: Hey! That's Red!
Red: It's all you guys from the, uh... From the plant, huh? So, we're all going after the same job. Well. That's, uh... That's terrific.
Dale: Boy, I wish I had your confidence, Red. I got nothing. All I can think to do is tell this guy I'm experienced, loyal, and hard-working.
Red: [inner monologue] Son of a bitch!

Kelso: So, I brought my books.
Jackie: Michael, we're not gonna study.
Kelso: We're not?
Jackie: No. My parents are gonna be gone for hours.
Kelso: Oh! So, what do you want to do?
[After Kelso and Jackie kiss, they lay down on the bed. The camera pans to her alarm clock, which shows the time of 6:48. When the time ticks up to 6:50, Jackie is laying on the bed reading a magazine and Kelso is putting his shirt back on]

Kelso: God, this is stupid.
Jackie: Shut up, Michael, I'm almost done.
Kelso: I can't believe I let you talk me into this.
Jackie: Okay. Here, take a look.
Kelso: Fine. Ok, yeah. My eyes are gorgeous.
Jackie: See? See, I told you. [gasps] Michael, do you know what you need now? Some blush.
Kelso: Whoa, whoa, whoa, Jackie. All right, glam is one thing, but I think we're crossing over into weird.
Jackie: No, no, trust me, Michael. We're not. With cheekbones like that, blush is your best friend.
Kelso: Yeah, I do have bitchin' cheekbones. Okay, let's blush.

Eric: You know what? This is probably just some kind of fire code thing. [the bouncer lets two guys in] Yeah, okay, wait. What's going on? We're next.
Bouncer: [laughs] No, you're not.
Eric: What are you talking about?
Bouncer: Well, Archie... I'm here to let the cool people in and keep the geeks out.
Fez: Those poor, stupid geeks. [laughs] Oh, my God, we are geeks!

Fez: Okay, that's it. You must let me in.
Bouncer: Why?
Fez: Because I feel the hot rhythm of disco burning in my loins. Watch. [dances] [crowd cheers]
Bouncer: Okay. You're in.
Fez: So long, losers.

Kelso: So, you're saying that this stuff won't come off? Like, even if I cry? Man, that's great.
Jackie: Oh, Michael, you are the best doll I have ever had. You know what? I have the perfect gown for you.
Kelso: All right, Jackie, slow down. Okay, wearing lipstick is one thing, but a gown? That's kind of fruity.
Jackie: No, no, it's not, Michael. Bowie wears dresses. Joe Namath wears pantyhose.
Kelso: Jackie. No.
Jackie: I'll be right back.
Kelso: Jackie, I said no. All right. Nothing too girly, and I mean it! [applies lip gloss]

Eric: [meekly] Yeah, well, when the revolution comes, man, your backs could be up against the wall... Damn it, let me in! My girlfriend's in there!
Bouncer: The foxy redhead? I thought that was your sister. What does she see in you?
Eric: You know what she sees, buddy? You know what she sees? ... Well, let me tell you something, if she was the bouncer, I'd be in that stupid club right now, you big ass. Yeah. I said it.

Eric: Okay, cream, two sugars. Well, you just drink up, and I'll just, I don't know, head inside.
Bouncer: Yeah. No.
Eric: Oh, come on. You suck. Mr. Big shot bouncer. Mr. "I open and close the rope." Mr. Boat man on the River Styx. Just, God, I bet you've never been excluded from anything in your whole life.
Bouncer: Hey, that's not fair. I've been excluded from lots of things.
Eric: Yeah? Like what?
Bouncer: ... Oh, no, okay. Uh, when I was in kindergarten, we used to play "Duck, Duck, Goose"... And nobody ever picked me to be the goose.
Eric: Oh, wow. That must have really hurt.
Bouncer: I didn't care.
Eric: You didn't care? Uh-huh. So, you're just sitting there, watching this kid go around the circle, duck, duck, duck... He'd get closer and closer. Duck... You'd be shaking with anticipation. Duck... "Maybe he'll pick me." Duck... "Maybe I'll get to run and laugh with the joy of being a goose." And then he'd come to you, place his hand on your head and say "Duck." And you're telling me you didn't care?
Bouncer: Okay, yeah, it hurts.
Eric: Yes, thank you. That's what I'm saying. And now you... have made me... the duck!
Bouncer: Wow. Oh, man. I didn't realize. Dance, goose. Dance.

Jackie: Oh, God, Michael, in that dress, you are way prettier than Bowie.
Kelso: Hell, I'm prettier than you.
Jackie: That's not funny, Michael.

Donna: Wow. What a night, right?
Eric: Oh, phew, exactly. Donna, why are you with me? Um, the bouncer wanted to know.
Donna: What did you tell him?
Eric: You know, I couldn't think of a reason.
Donna: Hmm. You know, come to think of it, I can't either. What I need to do is find a guy who's, like, totally different from you. Maybe big and dumb and, you know, not nice to me. Oh, and no sense of humor, so when I tell a joke, he doesn't get it. I mean, that's a real turn on.
Eric: Okay, enough.
Donna: No. No, no, no. Seriously. Thank you. I mean, if you hadn't have pointed this out to me, I might have wasted years with you. I mean, I almost had sex with you. Whoo! Thank you.
Eric: Okay, I think the question has become why am I with you? [Donna kisses Eric] Oh, right, okay.