Red: Come on, Kitty. Let's get the hell out of this weird place. I think some of these nurses are stealing drugs.
Kitty: Red, I am a nurse here. [chuckles]
Red: I stand by my statement.
Doctor: Okay, Mr. Forman, just to be clear, no going to work, no chores, no driving for three months. And let's not forget the root cause of the problem.
Eric: Too much rage, right? Yeah, so he probably shouldn't, like, yell at anyone anymore, right?
Doctor: Actually, the reason he ran into trouble is he was holding stuff in.
Eric: He was holding stuff in. Okay, I weigh 42 pounds 'cause of what he let out. And I'm sorry, you're telling me that, uh... There's more in there?
Kitty: [laughs] No, no, no. He does not weigh 42 pounds, and these two are the best of buddies. "Hey, Dad, wanna go fishing?" "Sure, son, let's hug." [laughs] That's what it's like at our house. [laughs]
Red: See what I mean about the drugs?

Kitty: Okay, okay, nap time. Oh, and, Eric, your father has a checkup next week, so I need you to take him.
Eric: Mom, I have to register for college, remember? I'm not gonna be here. I'm moving away.
Kitty: So you're still going?
Eric: Yes, I'm still going. It's college.
Kitty: Fine.
Eric: Mom, I gotta get out of here.
Red: Oh, Kitty, let him go. Odds are he's not gonna amount to anything, and I don't want him blaming me.
Eric: See? That is exactly the kind of thing that I have to get away from.

Kitty: And for you, my famous chocolate-chip caramel whipped cream pancakes.
Eric: Mom, you're not gonna bribe me into staying home from school with super-sweet breakfast food. Where are my sprinkles?
Kitty: No, no. The pancakes are an apology. I overreacted before. Of course you have to go to school.
Eric: So that's it? No guilt?
Kitty: That's right.
Red: What a nice warm family moment. Let's celebrate. With bacon.
Eric: Mmm. Bacon.

Eric: Mom, why are you doing laundry? It's almost midnight.
Kitty: Well, with your dad not working, I had to pick up a double shift at the hospital. It's the only time I have to do it.
Eric: Okay, don't do this.
Kitty: Do what?
Eric: Come down here in the middle of the night doing laundry, looking like hell.
Kitty: Oh, excuse me.
Eric: No, I- I'm just saying, you're trying to make me feel guilty for leaving, and it's not gonna work. I can't stay here. Okay? I have to go off and live my life. I deserve that. Mom, I deserve a chance!
Kitty: Okay, okay. No need to use your squeaky voice. I understand that you have to leave. I have bigger things to worry about than making you feel guilty.

Jackie: How could Steven say I'm not his type? I'm everybody's type. That's my thing.
Kelso: Well, at least you don't have to worry about me chasing after you anymore. I mean, most of the stuff you and Hyde used to argue about, I didn't even understand, which makes me think that you've become a complicated woman, and I don't want none of that.
Jackie: So you're really okay with us just being friends?
Kelso: Yeah. I release you. Fly, little bird. Fly, fly away! [imitates wings fluttering] That was you.

Jackie: Michael, do you think I'm immature?
Kelso: No, you're almost fully grown.
Jackie: Well, Steven thinks so. Apparently, I'm immature, and that skank in the leather jacket is what, cool? Well, I can be cool. People can change. Olivia Newton-John did it for John Travolta, and that movie was totally realistic.
[fantasy, Jackie and Donna walk into The Hub as the guys stand near the jukebox:]
Eric: Wow!
Kelso: Yowza!
Fez: Yummy.
Hyde: Jackie?
Jackie: Tell me about it, Steve.
[Hyde and Jackie sing "You're the One That I Want" from Grease]
Hyde: Oh, Jackie, you're so much cooler than that skank I was with before. Please take me back. 'Cause we belong together, like bop-bobba-loo-ba, sha-walla, she-bang, she-bang.
Kelso: Oh, the whole gang is back together again.
Fez: You did it. You did it.
[reality:]
Kelso: Are you gonna sing? 'Cause I've heard you sing and... You're not gonna sing, are you?
Jackie: No, but I'm gonna get Steven back, whatever it takes. And I'm gonna get me a pair of those black satin pants, 'cause I look good in those.

Eric: [shivers] So... cold. Can't... use the force.
Donna: Eric.
Eric: Leia? [wakes up] Oh, hi.
Donna: Were you like that all night?
Eric: No, no. From 1:00 to 4:00, I was whimpering because your knee was in my back. Yeah, we get to Madison next week, we're getting a bigger bed.
Donna: Eric, my knee was in your back because you were trying to hump me in your sleep.
Eric: No, I wasn't asleep.

Eric: So, Hyde, your competition for Jackie is, uh... [chuckles] Eggboy.
Fez: Ooh, that must be so humiliating.
Hyde: Fez, your wife's on your honeymoon with another guy.
Fez: Oh, no, no, no. Carlos is just like a... He's kind of like a chaperon. He, uh... Son of a bitch!

Eric: How you doing back there, Kels?
Kelso: My eyes feel tight. Do I look okay?
Eric: Oh, my god!
Hyde: Holy crap!
Kelso: What?! What?!
Eric: Nothing. We're just shocked at how... great you look.
Kelso: Oh. Sweatband. I'm wearing sweatbands now.

Kelso: They gave me 4 shots, none in the arm. [to a nurse] Hey, pretty lady, like what you see?