Eric Quote #544
Fez: Oh, Eric. What a glorious man-ring. See, I told you to accessorize and you finally listened, huh?
Eric: Man, you like it?
Fez: Yeah. What's not to like? It's hypnotic. It looks like he has superpowers.
Kelso: [chuckles] Man, I'd like to see the lame-o superhero that had to wear that ring.
[fantasy: Kelso is dressed as Batman, Fez as Aquaman, Hyde and Jackie as The Wonder Twins on the bridge of a space ship:]
Kelso: Okay, super pals I need a danger alert status report.
Hyde: My sensors indicate peace and quiet throughout the universe. [continues kissing Jackie]
Fez: I think the oceans are secure, but I cannot check for another 45 minutes. Because I just ate.
[Eric enters as Superman with Donna as Wonder Woman]
Eric: Hi, guys.
Kelso: No. You've been brainwashed and forced to wear this hideously ugly ring!
Donna: Actually, it's a gift. From me.
Hyde: Form of: the worst gift ever.
Jackie: Shape of: uh, hope you kept the receipt.
Eric: [beeping] Oh, no! Alien zombies are attacking the Earth. Let's swing into action, gang.
Kelso: Hang on a second! We're still on this ring.
Hyde: Are you sure it's not an evil alien artifact?
Donna: I got it at the mall.
Red: [over video screen] Greetings, super dumbasses.
Eric: Oh, no! It's Dr. Bald.
Red: Any minute now, my army of alien zombies will be inva- Good Lord! That is an ugly ring! Hey, alien zombies, get a load of that ring! [all laugh]
That '70s Show Quotes
‘Ramble On’ Quotes
Quote from Fez
Nina: According to your application, your last job was as Dancer Number Three in the school production of My Fair Lady.
Fez: Yes. It was magical. I could have danced all night.
Nina: Uh-huh. I'm afraid your theater experience doesn't really apply to working here at the D.M.V.
Fez: But, Nina, what is the D.M.V. really, if not one big stage?
Nina: The D.M.V. is the Department of Motor Vehicles. It is not a stage.
Fez: Ah, but in a way, they're very similar.
Nina: No, they're not.
Fez: Oh, but really, they are.
Nina: No, they're not.
Fez: Okay. They are.
Nina: No, they're not! I'm just gonna put down no prior experience.
Fez: Okay. Ah, but you haven't asked me about my special skills yet.
Nina: Well, I really don't see how a fondness for pie is relevant.
Fez: But, Nina, what is the D.M.V. really, if not one big pie shop?
Quote from Kitty
Kitty: Great. Clicker's on the fritz. All I want to do is see the end of Guiding Light, and it won't click. Click, damn it! Click!
Red: Kitty? I think your lady problem is acting up again.
Kitty: It jus- It just won't click, that's all. It's supposed to click, Red. It's a clicker. That's what it does.
Red: Okay. Let's get you to bed.
Eric: [enters] Okay, you guys? Uh, very important. Donna's coming over, and I lost the ring she gave me. I thought I had it in the basement.
Red: Eric, please! Your mother is having a breakdown.
Kitty: No. The only thing having a breakdown around here is the clicker! Why won't it click, Red? Nothing loves me!
Quote from Red
Red: I need cold compresses and a Bloody Mary. Quick! Your mother is talking about adopting a communist orphan. Now move. I need help, damn it!