Red Quote #1046
Quote from Red in Hyde's Birthday
Red: Steven, you're 18 now. It's time to start being a man. And the first rule to being a man is you gotta spend your life doing crap you don't wanna do. Like right now, I don't wanna be here talking to you but I am. And you don't wanna go to a party but you will.
Hyde: Actually, I won't.
Red: [mock sympathy] What's the matter? You don't like parties? Me neither. But as long as you're living under my roof, you'll do what I tell you to do.
Hyde: Well, lucky for me, I won't be under your roof much longer anyway.
Red: What the hell you talking about?
Hyde: Well, I'm 18. I should be getting out of here, right? I mean, that's what my dad did and my uncle did and my cousins did. They were all on their own when they were my age.
Red: What are they doing now?
Hyde: Uh, pumping gas, prison, prison, dead, prison.
Red: And the reason you're living here is so you don't end up like them. But if you want to leave, I can't stop you. So, what's it gonna be, Steven? Prison, death or a birthday party?
Hyde: I guess I'll go to the party. [clears throat] Thanks, Red.
Red: You're welcome. And, uh... don't tell Eric that we had this little conversation. 'Cause when he's 18, he's out.
That '70s Show Quotes
‘Hyde's Birthday’ Quotes
Quote from Kelso
Kelso: Red. Hey. You're wondering why I'm going through your stuff. Okay. That's... See, I needed, uh... to borrow your saw... because I need to chop down a tree. Because there's something stuck in it. An animal. A rabbit. There's a rabbit stuck in a tree. And I want to return that rabbit to the wild so it can lay its eggs.
Red: Kelso, rabbits don't- How the hell did a rabbit get up a tree?
[Eric and Donna sneak into the garage as Red and Kelso stand on the drive]
Kelso: Uh, Eric threw it up there.
Red: Eric threw a rabbit up a tree?
Kelso: Yeah. He's a sadistic bastard. You know he hit a cow?
Quote from Leo
Hyde: Oh, hey, uh, I can work tomorrow night if you want me to.
Leo: You're not working tomorrow, man. It's your birthday.
Hyde: Yeah, man, my 18th birthday. Otherwise known as the beginning of the end. The black hole, man. It's the death march. Look, if there's a war, I could get drafted.
Leo: If there's a war, I'll see you in Canada.
Hyde: That's not the point, Leo. I mean, there's other stuff too, you know.
Leo: Hey, don't get snippy with me, man.
Quote from Kitty
Red: Any good mail?
Kitty: Well, we got the new Yarn Barn catalog. And the model is showing cleavage? You know, if I want that in my house, I will watch McMillan and Wife.