Fez: Oh, don't put Batman in the clam of death, Riddler. That's just gonna make him mad. God, you're stupid.
Eric: Fez, for the last time, the Riddler can't hear you.
Fez: Riddle me this, Riddler. When Batman escapes from the clam of death who will kick your riddle-telling ass in?
Eric: Hey, Fez. Riddle me this. [slaps Fez]
Fez: Then riddle me this. [gives Eric a "wet willy"]
Eric: Oh, but, Fez, only if you riddle me this. [gives Fez a "purple nurple"]
Fez: Ow! Riddle me this, you son of a bitch! [they fight]

Mediator: Eric, just a few more questions. Is your father ever unnecessarily angry?
[Red looks at Eric and gestures for him to smile]
Eric: Unnecessarily angry? Well- [clears throat] You know, what does "unnecessarily" mean really? I mean, my sister likes to put salt on roast beef, but I think it's unnecessary. I mean, why cover up the flavor of such a delicious meat?
Red: Just answer the question, dumbass! I mean... [laughs] Good work, Son.

Kitty: Hi, sweetie. How was work?
Eric: Oh, pretty good except for the fact that Dad's getting sued for firing a Price Mart employee.
Kitty: Okay. Well, good. Have a cupcake.
Eric: Mom, did you hear what I said?
Kitty: Uh-huh, and it's just so very unpleasant, I'm ignoring it. So, have a cupcake.
Eric: Earl is suing Dad for wrongful termination.
Kitty: Earl? He didn't do his job. He was always late. He was a complete dumbass... person.
Eric: Mom, you said "ass."
Kitty: Well, now so did you. Give me back the cupcake, foul mouth.