Red Quote #941

Quote from Red in Till the Next Goodbye

Red: I can't believe that is what you idiots have been doing in my basement all these years!
[The background behind Red and Kitty sways as Eric stares at them]
Red: I wish I had 2,000 feet so I could put 500 of them in each of your asses!

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Features in the collection: Red Forman: My Foot in Your Ass.

‘Red Forman: My Foot in Your Ass’ Collection

Quote from Eric in It's Only Rock and Roll

Eric: Look, Mom, maybe you should stop worrying about everyone else so much and start thinking about yourself. Maybe you should find something to enrich your life. Oh, may I suggest the teachings of the Jedi?
Red: And may I suggest the footing of your ass?
Eric: This is not the ass you're looking for. See, now you don't know what to do.

Quote from Red in No Quarter

Red: You know, it occurs to me that since I paid the allowance that bought those records in the first place, that money's mine.
Eric: Well, it occurs to me that possession is 9/10ths of the law.
Red: Keep up with the smart mouth, and my foot will be 9/10ths of the way up your ass.
Hyde: You know, Forman, you should write a book: Things My Father Threatened To Put In My Ass. "Chapter One: His Foot." I'd buy that.

Quote from Red in That '70s Finale

Kelso: Oh, Mr. Forman, can I light this off in your house?
Red: Sure and then I'll light my foot off in your ass.
Hyde: And that, my friends, is the last "foot-in-ass" of the decade. Cheers.
Kitty: Michael, it is so good to see you. The girls in the emergency room were just asking about you.
Kelso: You know, it's like I've been gone for so long, I almost forgot you're a hot mom.
Kitty: Oh! [giggles]
Red: You know what else is hot? My foot when it's in your ass.
Hyde: Look at that. He had one more in him.

 ‘Till the Next Goodbye’ Quotes

Quote from Eric

[circle:]
Eric: Crap, it's almost time for me to go get my shots. Yeah, why do I have to get shots anyway? So I get Yellow Fever. I could use a little color.
Fez: You guys, this might be our last circle together. We're growing up. I mean, these two have jobs, and Eric is off to start his life, and I'm doing more shaving than ever.
Kelso: Eric, I know you're scared of getting your shots. So I'm gonna be a pal and get them with you, 'cause I owe you for that time that I chucked that dead raccoon at you, and then it turned out to not be dead. And then it bit you, and then you kicked it back at me, and then it bit me, and then we both had to go and get rabies shots.
Hyde: [laughs] Remember, on the way to the hospital, Kelso saw that dog, and he jumped out of the car 'cause he wanted to go pet it, but he forgot the car was moving, and he broke his arm? That was the funniest, bloodiest, most rabies-filled day ever.
Eric: Look at us. Best friends offering to help each other. You know, we always have to remember this moment.
[As Red stands behind Eric in the circle, Fez, Kelso and Hyde look up in awe]
Eric: What?
Red: Upstairs, now.
Eric: I am in huge trouble. [laughs]

Quote from Kitty

Kitty: I'm shocked. The basement door closes and out come the lighters and the drugs. And I am sure Donna's down there bouncing around without a bra. It's like Amsterdam down there.

Quote from Bob

Bob: So did you get your shots yet?
Eric: Wait. What shots?
Bob: The vaccines to protect you against exotic diseases. I had to get them when I was in the military.
Red: You were in the National Guard. What exotic diseases were you afraid you'd catch, scaredy-cat-eating-pie-in-a-Jacuzzi fever?
Bob: Hey, I'm proud of my service. Somebody had to stay home and hose down those hippies.

 Red Forman Quotes

Quote from No Quarter

Red: You know, it occurs to me that since I paid the allowance that bought those records in the first place, that money's mine.
Eric: Well, it occurs to me that possession is 9/10ths of the law.
Red: Keep up with the smart mouth, and my foot will be 9/10ths of the way up your ass.
Hyde: You know, Forman, you should write a book: Things My Father Threatened To Put In My Ass. "Chapter One: His Foot." I'd buy that.

Quote from That '70s Finale

Kelso: Oh, Mr. Forman, can I light this off in your house?
Red: Sure and then I'll light my foot off in your ass.
Hyde: And that, my friends, is the last "foot-in-ass" of the decade. Cheers.
Kitty: Michael, it is so good to see you. The girls in the emergency room were just asking about you.
Kelso: You know, it's like I've been gone for so long, I almost forgot you're a hot mom.
Kitty: Oh! [giggles]
Red: You know what else is hot? My foot when it's in your ass.
Hyde: Look at that. He had one more in him.

Quote from On with the Show

Red: Have you been in bed all day?
Eric: Yeah, I have. I've been reading the Jack Kerouac classic On The Road. See, as I see it, why get out of bed when you can read about people who got out of bed?
Red: You have got to be the laziest non-communist I've ever met. And you are about to read a book that my foot wrote. It's called On The Road To In Your Ass.