Eric Quote #750
Quote from Eric in Baby Don't You Do It
Pastor Dan: Okay, what did you want to tell me?
Donna: Well, you see, Pastor Dan, when we were here before and you had asked us about premarital sex, we might have...
Eric: We lied, okay? We have had sex zillions of times. I used to try to keep track on a pad, but it got unwieldy. Oh, God.
Donna: Eric!
Eric: Well, I'm sorry, Donna, but we are knocking on hell's door, and I ain't going in!
Pastor Dan: Eric, you're not going to hell. Well, you might be. I don't know you that well. I just think you're depriving yourselves of that wonderful moment when marriage is cemented by giving the gift of yourselves.
Donna: Wow. I never thought about it that way.
Pastor Dan: Maybe that's why you couldn't figure out the whole excitement about marriage. The one thing you should have been looking forward to, you had already experienced. Maybe you knew that without realizing it.
Eric: Um... I don't mean to bring up Star Wars again... This is a lot like Luke before he discovered the Force.
Pastor Dan: Exactly. And what is the Force in real life?
[Eric gasps and points to the heavens]
That '70s Show Quotes
‘Baby Don't You Do It’ Quotes
Quote from Kelso
Kelso: Okay, fine. I was at the Academy when the auditorium burnt down, but it totally wasn't my fault. See, I got there early to practice with my flare gun 'cause I wanted to show Brooke an actual B for a change.
Fez: Okay, so far, 0% your fault.
Kelso: All right, so I accidentally shot off a flare, and it went all... Like, right underneath the bleachers.
Hyde: Well, we've just jumped up to about 60% your fault.
Kelso: Okay, so then I shot off another flare at the first flare 'cause you know what they say. You've got to fight fire with fire.
Jackie: Yeah, this is now, like, 99% your fault.
Kelso: So then I shot off another flare to warn people about the fire. But that one just went right up and on the roof, and that's when I just got the hell out of there.
Quote from Kitty
Kitty: What I don't understand is how you can lie to a pastor in church.
Donna: Well, Mrs. Forman, what about the time you lied to Pastor Dan? You told him your dog ate your bake sale cookies, but you didn't bake them 'cause you were too busy sipping Kahlua and watching that Paul Newman retrospective.
Kitty: I did not lie to Pastor Dan in church. I lied to him at the market, and at the market, he is just a regular man. Now, you two march back to church and tell him the truth. And for your information, Donna, Kahlua is barely a drink. It's like root beer.
Quote from Fez
Fez: Oh, the cousin kiss. The sexiest of all relative kisses. Right above big-breasted aunt and sleepy grandma.
Hyde: Did you just say, "sleepy grandma"? You telling me you kiss your grandma?
Fez: Not my grandma, a grandma. Sick bastard.