Kelso Quote #768

Quote from Kelso in Can't You Hear Me Knocking

Eric: Hey, guys, you know what? Maybe the FBI has an opinion 'cause they're listening to us. Remember the V-A-C-U-U-M?
Hyde: It spelled "vacuum."
Kelso: Whoa, vacuum has two "u's" in it? No, that's messed up.

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 ‘Can't You Hear Me Knocking’ Quotes

Quote from Hyde

Kelso: There's a black Ford sedan outside. Hyde's right, the Feds found us.
Hyde: Damn it, Kelso. You finally figure out how to use a phone, now we're all going to jail.
Eric: I think you guys are overreacting. There's no way the government would park a car right outside my house.
Hyde: Forman, anything you think the government's not doing, they are doing. The only thing they didn't do is land the man on the moon. No, no, no, no, no. Spielberg shot the entire thing in a Hollywood movie set. That's how he got the job for Jaws.

Quote from Kelso

Eric: Kelso, if you ask the White House if there's a Russian death ray, they're gonna have you committed. So, yeah, I say go for it.
Kelso: Well, obviously they won't admit it. There'd be panic in the streets. That's why I gotta trick them into talking about it. It's what us cops call "tricking them." I'm on. [on the phone] Hello? White House? Yeah, yes, I have a couple of questions. Yes, uh, how well is the President protected? Well, uh... because someone wants to hurt the President, that's why. You're damn right it's a threat, it's a terrible threat on the President's life. [Eric laughs]
Hyde: Awesome.
Kelso: What? Where am I right now? I'm in Red Forman's house in Point Place...
All: No! [Hyde hangs up the phone]
Hyde: You idiot, you just told them where we are.
Kelso: So?
Hyde: Kelso, you just threatened the President's life. They're gonna come here and arrest us.
Kelso: No, no, I'm not threatening his life. It's the Russians that have the Russian death ray.
Fez: You didn't mention the death ray.
Kelso: A-ha! So you admit that there's a death ray.

Quote from Red

Red: Oh, my God. There's a hundred morons in my basement. That's okay, not even that can ruin this day.
Eric: Yes, one man, and only one man, has the power to ruin his day. 'Tis I.
Red: Nope, not even you can do it. But really, who the hell talks like that?