Red Quote #604

Quote from Red in Going Mobile

Kitty: Well, I think this place is great. You can... You can just... You can drive your car right up to it and then, then you have a walk-in closet.
Donna: And look at our teeny, tiny bathroom.
Red: Eric, can I talk to you privately in the living room... The dining... The left front quadrant? Son, living here is a real bad idea. There's no privacy. Where will you hide if Donna has a chore for you? You'll have to dive under the trailer.
Kitty: Honey, would you help me unload some groceries from the car?
Red: See what I mean? I'm cornered, like an animal. Coming, honey. Your life is gonna be a living hell.

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 ‘Going Mobile’ Quotes

Quote from Fez

Hyde: So, let's just do rock, paper, scissors, see who the best man is, all right?
Fez: No, no, no, no. I hate that game. I always lose.
Hyde: 'Cause you always pick rock.
Fez: That's because nothing beats rock.
Hyde: Paper beats rock. Those are the rules.
Fez: Eh, not buying it.
Hyde: Fine. We'll play a new game. How about cockroach, foot, nuclear bomb? Foot squashes cockroach. Nuclear bomb... Pow! ...blows up foot. And cockroach survives nuclear bomb.
Fez: Oh, that's great. I'll be nuclear bomb. Nothing beats nuclear bomb.
Hyde: I just told you, cockroach beats nuclear bomb.
Fez: Oh, we'll see about that.

Quote from Bob

Bob: Oh, hey, Kitty. Listen, I think I'm just gonna take Donna home and call it a night.
Kitty: Oh, don't you dare. We need to act like everything is normal. Keep the party going. Keep Donna happy. Didn't you have a speech to give?
Bob: Kitty, I don't think it's still appropriate...
Kitty: Okay, Bob's got a speech. Everybody, listen to Bob's speech. Speech! Speech!
Bob: I guess I could change a few things as I go along. [clears throat] "To the lovely bride and the handsome...
bride. I know the... one of you will make... yourself very happy. Your life will surely be enriched by all the time you spend with... alone. You are truly one soul becoming one joined... alone forever. So I don't look at this as the day I lose a daughter. I look at this as the day I gain... nobody." Salute.

Quote from Fez

Hyde: Ready? One, two, three. Cockroach beats nuclear bomb. That is 38 wins in a row. I think it's safe to say that I'm the best man.
Fez: No, wait a minute. Wait a minute. I just noticed something. Cockroach always wins. One more time, for all the marbles.
Hyde: Fine. One, two, three. [Hyde plays foot and Fez plays cockroach]
Fez: Foot, I forgot about foot. So foot always wins. One more time. Winner, best man, period.
Hyde: One, two, three.
Fez: Bomb! Nuclear bomb beats foot. It's like everything in this game loses to something else!
Hyde: Yes, it's exactly like that.
Fez: Wait, except... Aha! I was so blind. Nuclear bomb beats everything. One more time, winner take all.
Hyde: One, two, three. [Hyde plays cockroach and Fez plays nuclear bomb]
Fez: I'm going home.