Eric Quote #771

Quote from Eric in Don't You Think It's Alright?

Eric: Donna, what's the matter?
Donna: You picked a deer-foot fork just to get out of shopping with me.
Eric: Oh, too obvious, huh? Yeah, no one wants hairy silverware.
Donna: I just don't understand how you could have more fun with Jackie than with me.
Eric: I don't know. I mean, you know, she doesn't ask me questions. She just tells me what to do. It's a strange kind of freedom, but I know why the caged bird sings, Donna.
Donna: So you're saying the way to handle you is just take away your free will and order you around?
Eric: Donna, that's the way I was raised.

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 ‘Don't You Think It's Alright?’ Quotes

Quote from Red

Eric: I just spent six hours registering for wedding gifts. The only reason I'm here now is I pretended to choke on ice cream.
Red: I'll let you in on a little secret for when you're shopping with women. Always pick the ugliest, worst choice, and you're off the hook. That's how I got out of shopping for this couch.
Eric: There was an uglier couch than this?
Red: The one I picked had dragons on it.
Eric: Wow, you're sneaky. You know, you act like you're all about brute force, but you're a finesse player, man.
Red: Trust me, son. Don't budge until you hear the magic words, "Oh, I'll just do it myself."
Kitty: [enters] You're done registering already? You men, you just don't know how to shop. You know, your father once tried to get me to buy a couch with dragons on it.
Red: Yeah, I guess I'm just bad at it.

Quote from Kitty

Red: Reading another one of your dirty girl books?
Kitty: They're not dirty, they're romantic.
Red: Mutiny From Behind.
Kitty: Yeah. The mutiny sneaks up on her.
Red: I don't think that's what it means.
Kitty: Well, it is a wonderful book. It's got pirates and action. Oh, oh, oh! It has this hilarious parrot that says the most inappropriate things. [laughs]
Red: [reads] "The pirate's vessel slowly sailed into the harbor of San Sebastian island. His saucy prisoner's alabaster breasts heaving with every motion of the tall, rigid ship." [out loud] San Sebastian island. I think I killed some commies there.

 Eric Forman Quotes

Quote from It's Only Rock and Roll

Eric: Look, Mom, maybe you should stop worrying about everyone else so much and start thinking about yourself. Maybe you should find something to enrich your life. Oh, may I suggest the teachings of the Jedi?
Red: And may I suggest the footing of your ass?
Eric: This is not the ass you're looking for. See, now you don't know what to do.

Quote from Till the Next Goodbye

[circle:]
Eric: Crap, it's almost time for me to go get my shots. Yeah, why do I have to get shots anyway? So I get Yellow Fever. I could use a little color.
Fez: You guys, this might be our last circle together. We're growing up. I mean, these two have jobs, and Eric is off to start his life, and I'm doing more shaving than ever.
Kelso: Eric, I know you're scared of getting your shots. So I'm gonna be a pal and get them with you, 'cause I owe you for that time that I chucked that dead raccoon at you, and then it turned out to not be dead. And then it bit you, and then you kicked it back at me, and then it bit me, and then we both had to go and get rabies shots.
Hyde: [laughs] Remember, on the way to the hospital, Kelso saw that dog, and he jumped out of the car 'cause he wanted to go pet it, but he forgot the car was moving, and he broke his arm? That was the funniest, bloodiest, most rabies-filled day ever.
Eric: Look at us. Best friends offering to help each other. You know, we always have to remember this moment.
[As Red stands behind Eric in the circle, Fez, Kelso and Hyde look up in awe]
Eric: What?
Red: Upstairs, now.
Eric: I am in huge trouble. [laughs]