Kelso Quote #569

Quote from Kelso in I'm Free

Hyde: How about the fact that Brooke's got your feeble-minded bun in her oven.
Kelso: Look, she can't be pregnant, okay? It just can't be true.
Jackie: Michael, this is not something girls lie about, okay? I would know. I'm an expert on girl lies.
Donna: Kelso, you're gonna have to do something about this.
Kelso: No, but doing something is not in my nature. "Ignore," "avoid," "run away"... These words have been very good to me.
Donna: You're horrible.
Jackie: What a pig.
Kelso: You know what? You girls don't even know what I'm going through here. You can have all the sex you want, you don't have to worry about getting anyone pregnant.

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 ‘I'm Free’ Quotes

Quote from Red

Kitty: Okay, Red, just because he sat in your chair is no reason to get the boy deported.
Fez: You don't like me because I'm not from here.
Red: This has nothing to do with you being a foreigner. It's about you taking advantage of my daughter like a sneaky foreigner.

Quote from Red

Red: All right, fine, I won't volunteer anything. But if he asks me a direct question, I'm not lying.
Kitty: Oh, you won't have to. I'll do all the talking for you.
Red: Well, you'll be good at that. And I guess it might be fun to just sit back and watch Tarzan here crumble before the full force of the U.S. government.
Fez: Okay, that's it. Anwar I can deal with. Tonto, in the ballpark, but Tarzan... Tarzan is a white guy.
Red: Don't sass me, Tarzan.

 Michael Kelso Quotes

Quote from Immigrant Song

Hyde: Way to go. If you hadn't fallen off the water tower, we could've helped him out.
[After Hyde punches Kelso in the arm, Kelso groans as he uses his sprained hand to hit Hyde back.]
Hyde: They should've x-rayed your head at the hospital.
Kelso: They did. And for your information, they found nothing.

Quote from Misty Mountain Hop

Kitty: Steven, what's in the bag?
Kelso: The Packers winning next year's Super Bowl. That's what's in the bag.
Red: Is that what I think it is?
Kelso: If you mean paprika, yes, sir.
Kitty: Honey- Honey, paprika is red.
Kelso: If you mean green paprika, yes, sir!
Red: Green paprika?!
Kelso: Hyde, what am I looking for here?
Hyde: Oregano.
Kelso: If you mean oregano, yes, sir!