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‘Misty Mountain Hop’ Quotes Page 1 of 3    

That '70s Show: Misty Mountain Hop

512. Misty Mountain Hop

Aired January 22, 2003

After Red and Kitty volunteer to help Jackie clear out her father's cabin, Hyde, Kelso and Fez sneak up there for a party. Meanwhile, Eric and Donna get lost on the drive to the cabin.

Quote from Kelso

Kitty: Steven, what's in the bag?
Kelso: The Packers winning next year's Super Bowl. That's what's in the bag.
Red: Is that what I think it is?
Kelso: If you mean paprika, yes, sir.
Kitty: Honey- Honey, paprika is red.
Kelso: If you mean green paprika, yes, sir!
Red: Green paprika?!
Kelso: Hyde, what am I looking for here?
Hyde: Oregano.
Kelso: If you mean oregano, yes, sir!


Quote from Red

Red: What's going on?
Kelso: Oh, just a classic case of hand stuck in vase.
Red: Well, get it off, or you'll have a classic case of foot stuck in ass.

Quote from Hyde

Jackie: Oh, God. Steven, you know what? I thought you finally understood what being a couple was about.
Hyde: Well, what is being a couple? It's all about give-and-take, yin and yang. It's a philosophical paradox like a tree falling in the forest with no one around to hear it. Does it make a noise? Who's to say?
Jackie: Okay. You're just confusing me.
Hyde: You see? It's murky. That's what I'm up against.
Jackie: Oh, my God. What a load of crap!
Hyde: Who's to say what crap is?

Quote from Jackie

Jackie: Look, that stash wasn't his. It was mine.
Hyde: Jackie.
Jackie: Let me talk.
Kelso: Yeah, Hyde. Let her talk.
Jackie: Okay. Look, it's just- I've been having such a hard time since my dad's been in jail that I was looking for anything that just might make me feel better. Mrs. Forman, it's like you with your menopause and all that wine you're always drinking.
Kitty: Well, you shut your dirty, little mouth.

Quote from Kelso

Red: Now, Steven, you tell me the truth right now. Is this yours or not?
Hyde: Mr. Forman, I'm telling you the truth. It's not mine.
Red: Okay. Fine. Well, I don't care whose it is. I'm throwing it in the lake.
Kelso: What? I paid 20 bucks for that. [off Red's look] You got my parents' number.
Fez: That'll teach you to sell me out, you son of a bitch.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Donna, I think I may have overreacted a little bit. I mean, there are plenty of Twinkies in the world. I mean, sure, there was only one in the car, and you did go Godzilla on it but look, I'm sorry.
Donna: Well, if it makes you feel any better, it didn't taste very good. I think it was a knockoff.
Eric: Yeah, my mom buys "Twonkies." Look, Donna, we had a goal at the beginning of this trip. We were gonna be romantic in some place new and different and I am a man who likes to finish what he started. So may I suggest on my kitchen table?
Donna: You know what? Okay. All right. Yeah, your parents won't be home until tomorrow.
Eric: Oh, my God. You're going for this? Okay. Okay. Great. What the hell was in that "Twonkie"?
[As Eric and Donna go inside, Red and Kitty return home:]
Red: You believe that kid? First he doesn't show up, then he blocks the driveway.
Kitty: Well, I will just be happy to get back in our nice, quiet house. Oh, my God!
Donna: [o.s.] Oh, my God.
Hyde: All right. It's Donna's butt.
Red: Damn it! That's where I eat dinner!

Quote from Red

Kitty: Here you go, Red. Belgian waffles.
Eric: What's Belgian about 'em?
Red: They crumble at the hands of the Nazis.

Quote from Red

Jackie: My dad is broke. I mean, in fact, the bank foreclosed on our ski cabin. Everything's gotta be moved out this weekend and it's all up to me. And I'm just so very small. [looks to Red]
Red: Well, I'd like to help, but not as much as I'd like not to.
Kitty: Too late. Already packed an overnight bag.
Red: Kitty, why is it we always do what you wanna do and never do what I wanna do?
Kitty: It's in the Bible. [laughs]
Eric: Well, have a fun weekend, Pops.
Red: Oh, you're coming too, pal. And there's gonna be heavy lifting. You better bring Donna.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Jackie, why can't Hyde help? Oh, that's right. He's your boyfriend. I guess that's punishment enough.
Jackie: Now, I've been with Steven long enough to know the best way to keep our relationship going smoothly is by never asking him to do stuff. So instead I told him I'd be out of town this weekend for a big doll expo.
Eric: Oh, there's a doll expo? Man, I've been looking for jungle-fighting G.I. Joe. He's got vine grip and poisoned darts. "Poison not included." [chuckles] I left mine out in the rain. He got jungle rot. I- I had to amputate his foot.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Wait. Wait a second. Donna, when did that U-Haul we've been following turn into an ice cream truck? Oh. Oh, man. We lost Red.
Donna: No. Wait, we can't be that far off-trail. Let's look at Jackie's directions. Okay. "I-43 to Highway 60. Head east when it gets different." "When it gets different." What the hell does that mean?
Eric: Wait. Let me see that. "Go a ways past the fancy thing and turn left at the ugly house." Oh. Well, if the "fancy thing's" a dead cow, then we're almost there.

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