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‘Kitty and Eric's Night Out’ Quotes Page 1 of 4    

That '70s Show: Kitty and Eric's Night Out

218. Kitty and Eric's Night Out

Aired February 28, 2000

When Red forces Eric to spend time with his mother, he and Kitty go see Annie Hall together. Meanwhile, Jackie is jealous when Fez gets a girlfriend, and Hyde plays board games with Leo at the photo hut.

Quote from Leo

Hyde: So now Patty's seein' Fez, and I just don't get it. 'Cause she could've had me. I'm a real catch, man.
Leo: All right! I had twins, man! Oh, look. They're so beautiful!
Hyde: Congratulations. Thanks, man.
Leo: Hey, I don't wanna be competitive or anything, man, but, uh, I've got two kids, and you don't have any. You're just a lonely plumber, dude.
Hyde: It wouldn't be so bad, but it's Fez. I taught him everything he knows. It's all backwards, man.
Leo: I guess you just can't dwell on things, man.
Hyde: Yeah. Maybe I should just be happy for Fez. I mean, this is the first time in his whole life that he's ever had a girl, you know.
Leo: Now, you know, a while back, I picked up a card that, you know, and I had a car accident... And, uh, I was dwelling on that, man. I'm sorry, what were you talkin' about?
Hyde: Maybe I should get back to work.
Leo: If you get back to work, you're fired, man. Hey, I got twins again, man!

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Quote from Jackie

Donna: Jackie, did you ever think that maybe you hate Patty because you like Fez?
Jackie: Oh, you are in dangerous territory, Pinciotti.
Donna: No, I mean, it's true. You hate seeing Fez drool over someone other than you.
Jackie: You're crazy. I don't like Fez.
Donna: I think you do.
Jackie: Oh, shut up.
Donna: Jackie, you're blushing! [Jackie pinches Donna's arm] Ow!
Jackie: I'll admit that, uh... Fez would be okay for a quick fling if I was off on a vacation with my parents, like in Michigan or Cuba. Where no one would ever find out! Ever, ever, ever!

Quote from Leo

Leo: B-3.
Hyde: Hit. Damn! You sank my battleship!
Leo: You know, a well-maintained fleet is the backbone of any military structure, and with your floating arsenal depleted, your troops are likely to suffer some serious collateral damage.
Hyde: Huh.
Leo: Wow. Hey, you know what, man? I think I might have been in the navy.

Quote from Kitty

Kitty: Well, now, see, I didn't know that you liked green peppers. When did that happen?
Eric: August 5, 1972. I mean... I mean, do you like green peppers?
Kitty: Why, yes I do. Very much. So how's Donna?
Eric: What? We haven't done anything yet. What?
Kitty: Relax. I am not here to grill you about your life, Eric. But, you know, young adults do have a responsibility.
Eric: Mom! Please.
Kitty: [giggles] Honey, you may not realize it right now, but I am actually doing you a giant favor by making you spend time with me.
Eric: Well, thank you.
Kitty: No, no, no. I mean it. Boys who reject their mothers grow up to have huge problems. You will hate yourself. And every relationship you have with a woman will just be a mess. So, if you don't spend time with me now, you may never have sex. [laughs] I'm teasing! A little.

Quote from Kitty

Eric: [inner monologue] "I'm finally getting the feeling back in my jaw?" I don't get that. I mean, he was just in bed with her and... Oh! Okay. I see. Oh, God. I hope my mom doesn't get that.
Kitty: [inner monologue] Ooh. I wonder if Eric gets that. Well, I am not gonna explain it to him.
[Kitty and Eric awkwardly smile at each other]

Quote from Eric

Kitty: Well, boy, wasn't that fun, seeing all those sex scenes with your mother?
Eric: Oh, it was supersexy. I'm so glad we could enjoy that together. Really, I am.
Kitty: So, I guess women in New York don't wear bras.
Eric: Um, it's disgusting... And we should move there immediately.
Kitty: Well, I don't know about you, but I've seen enough nipples for one day.
Eric: Mom.
Kitty: What?
Eric: I don't ever want to hear you say, "Nipples," okay?
Kitty: Why not? Men have nipples. Your father has nipples.
Eric: No! He does not!
Kitty: Okay. So, what was your favorite part of the movie?
Eric: Eh, I don't want to tell you.
Kitty: Oh, come on.
Eric: Okay, um... Diane Keaton's nipples. [both laugh]

Quote from Kelso

Kelso: Hey, didn't you go out with that girl?
Hyde: I don't think so.
Kelso: Yeah. That's the girl that dogged you on that blind date.
Hyde: Kelso, who cares? Hey, let's see what loser she ended up with.
Kelso: Yeah.
[Hyde opens the car door to find Fez inside]
Fez: Hello.
Kelso: Burn! Hey man, that's a burn.

Quote from Kitty

Kitty: Eric, honey, I was thinking maybe tomorrow night we could go shopping, just the two of us.
Eric: Why?
Kitty: Well, because we need to get you some new shoes and some underwear.
Red: Kitty, we bought him shoes last year.
Eric: Yeah, and I can shop for my own underwear.
Kitty: Oh, no, you cannot. The last time you went, you bought them too snug, and I want grandchildren.

Quote from Eric

Eric: [inner monologue] Whoa! Diane Keaton is not wearing a bra. Okay, don't let your mom see you look. But I have to look. I'm lookin'. I'm lookin', and I don't care!

Quote from Eric

Kitty: [inner monologue] Oh, please. He expects her to make love while he's wearing those black socks?
Eric: [inner monologue] Note to self, throw away all black socks.

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