Jeff: Hey, hey!
Amy: Jeff? What are you doing here?
Jeff: Thought I'd surprise you, check in on the event from the Cloud 9 side of things.
Amy: Oh, wow. You survived the acquisition? Not that I thought that they were gonna fire you. I mean, obviously they value your... Jeff, this is Isabel. She works at Zephra.
Jeff: Oh, oh, the parent company! Oh, maybe I should call you Mommy. I'm gay, so that's not weird.
Isabel: Oh good, 'cause for a second I almost thought it was.

Sandra: You have five minutes to tell Amy, or I will.
Jonah: Tell Amy what?
Sandra: How you were flirting with that lady. Turning each other's cranks. I thought you two were gonna do it right here on the belt.
Jonah: Oh, come on, Sandra. I was just being friendly. Customers appreciate a little, you know, human connection.
Sandra: Ugh. Close your legs, Jonah.
Jonah: My legs are fine, and if anything, we should be a little friendlier than usual today to get people to round up for charity.
Sandra: Not if it means betraying the woman you love. Trust me, I'm married now. Don't you dream about someday having what Jerry and I have?
Jonah: Of course... Well, exactly what you and Jerry... It's fine, Sandra. [to female customer] Hi. How's it going? Hope you didn't have any trouble finding those toe warmers.
Sandra: He's gonna die alone.

Jeff: Hey, folks. How's that digital coming?
Isabel: Good, yeah. We're getting some good digital. Actually, Amy's just showing me around a little before the buses come so I can get a sense of what she's like as a manager.
Jeff: Ooh. Feels like I should get in on that action.
Amy: Does it?
Isabel: Yeah, actually, it would be really helpful to get some quotes from corporate.
Amy: Yeah, sure. That- That would be great.
Jeff: Nice. We'll make it a three-way. Again, totally gay.

Amy: And this is the break room. Um... Oh, I... I noticed that there was always a really long line at the toaster, so I bought another one. Which, you know, I think people appreciated.
Jeff: I think you got your headline there, "Manager buys toaster."
Amy: That's helpful, Jeff. Thank you. Oh, and also, I know how hard it is to eat healthy during long shifts, so I keep this cabinet full of healthy snacks for everyone.
Jeff: Oof, that cabinet is pretty full. Seems like people would rather die than eat that stuff.
Amy: Well, I just replenished it.
Jeff: Yeah, and thank you for the healthy seaweed snack, SpongeBob. Just messing with you, SpongeBob.
Amy: Sorry, I'm... I'm SpongeBob? Is...

Dina: All right, there's a scarf in here. Now be careful. That's a loose knit, so avoid all hooks and low-hanging branches. It'll pop your head clean off.

Garrett: Okay, so now you're saying I don't know how to count?
Glenn: Well, no offense, Garrett, but you did say "intensive purposes," which, apparently, is kind of dumb.
Garrett: I'm not dumb! I'm one of the smartest people in the store.
Dina: Well, that's a bit of a stretch.
Garrett: It's true. It's kind of my thing. People are always like, "Garrett, he's clever and funny."
Dina: Okay, then be clever and funny.
Garrett: Well... No, not... It's not appropriate right now when we're missing a package.
Dina: I'll set you up for it, okay? A Polish guy and a blonde walk into a bar.
Garrett: What?
Dina: Come on, man. I put you on the one yard line.

Sandra: Your total is $3.89. Would you like to round up for charity?
Man: Not today, thanks.
Jonah: Hey, Sandra, aren't these your favorite kind of chips?
Sandra: Yes. I love these chips.
Man: Oh. Cool.
Sandra: Uh-huh. You're a lucky man. And these, um, are some lucky chips 'cause they get to take a ride in that hot little mouth of yours. Nope. Oh, my God. I have to call Jerry. [on the phone] Jerry? Jonah made me seduce a man.

Isabel: Would you say you have a unique management style?
Amy: Yeah. Yeah, I would say that.
Isabel: Could you actually say it just so I can quote you?
Jeff: Everything's pulling teeth with this one. It's like, what are you, a dentist? I mean, come on...
Amy: Jeff! Enough. Listen, I am a working mother, and I came up from the floor, but it was worth it because as a manager, I know what my people need from me, so it might seem silly, but small things like healthy snacks actually make a difference.
Jeff: Yikes, Amy. Brag much?
Isabel: Hey, Jeff, why don't you give us a minute? Maybe go grab a coffee or literally anything?
Jeff: I'm not clear whether I report to you or not, so I am gonna grab that coffee.

Glenn: What, don't you think it's nice that someone helped out Cheyenne?
Janet: Oh, yeah, but where's my guardian angel? I've got two kids and an underwater mortgage.
Justine: And my heat broke, so I have to stay with friends. I have lots of offers, but if anyone wants to throw their hat into the ring.
Glenn: Wow, looks like lots of folks are having a rough time, huh?
Janet: Yeah, but it figures only Cheyenne would get a care package. I bet this guardian angel is just some sort of pervert.
Glenn: What? No! I mean, unless you mean a pervert for giving.
Janet: I mean a pervert for pervin'. [Glenn gasps]
Cheyenne: Guys, I'm sure the guardian angel is gonna give everyone a care package. Otherwise, it's just unfair.

Jonah: Ah, I was probably 25 when I finally heard of dryer sheets. Before that, it was just like wrinkles, shminkles, you know. Let's hit the club.
Sandra: [chuckles] You know who else likes dryer sheets? Jonah's girlfriend. Which he has. Your total is $26.17.
Woman: Oh, I'll round up for charity.
Sandra: No. No rounding up. Not like this.