Carol: Today was fun. Sometimes I feel like people think I'm a weirdo, but you made me feel really cool today.
Cheyenne: Aw, can I be real with you a sec? Dina assigned me to hang out with you today to, like, write down any bad or crazy things you did. She said Corporate wanted it.
Carol: My lawyer warned me this might happen.
Cheyenne: But don't worry, I'm not gonna give them anything because, bottom of my heart, you are, like, high-key fire.
Carol: Oh, well, thanks. And I know you won't give them anything because I recorded your little confession. How you stole that makeup? So you screw with me, you get fired.
Cheyenne: Carol, that is so savage. I love you so much right now.
Carol: I know you do. Bye, bitch.
Cheyenne: Goodbye, bitch.

Cheyenne: Oh, I've been meaning to ask. I've been floor supervisor a while now, but I'm still getting paid the same.
Dina: Zephra has the paperwork. They're processing it, it just takes a little time.
Cheyenne: Right. But it's just...
Dina: Cheyenne, it's coming, okay? Don't be greedy. That's how Steve Jobs died.
Cheyenne: Oh.

Carol: So it's come to this. Everyone else refused to work with me so I guess the floor supervisor has to do it.
Cheyenne: Uh, yeah, that.
Carol: Okay, top shelf. Whoops. Almost forgot my safety belt.
Cheyenne: Hmm, right. Would've sucked if you forgot.
Carol: Ugh, you know, they don't pay us enough to deal with this crap. Well, me. I guess you're making more now.
Cheyenne: Nah, I actually haven't gotten my pay raise yet. Dina said something about my paperwork still processing. I guess it has something to do with the economy being so bad or good or whatever.
Carol: No, friend, you're getting screwed. This is classic Corporate. We do all the work and they're the ones getting rich up in their fancy Zephra campus with their free sushi and daycare and covered parking.
Cheyenne: [scoffs] What? They get free daycare? Sometimes I have to leave Harmonica zipped up in our trampoline with snacks.
Carol: That's why I'm suing. I'm tired of waiting for their crumbs to hit the floor. I am taking a seat at the table, and I'm gonna lick everybody's bread.
Cheyenne: That is so gross and cool.
Carol: Thanks. You know, I'm gonna win this lawsuit for all of us, and if I lose, I'll burn down that Zephra daycare for you.
Cheyenne: Oh, my God. All I can say is wow, and, um, please don't do that.

Mateo: Okay. You guys will be working together. Isn't that funny? The two of you, who used to date, and live together. Life is so random.
Jonah: I don't know what this is, but I'm sorry.
Kelly: Am I dead? Is that why I keep ending up here?

Jonah: Just so you know, I had no part in this. Everybody thinks I'm still hung up on Amy.
Kelly: Oh, no, thank you.
Jonah: What?
Kelly: I'm done getting tangled in the crazy of you people. So I'm keeping my head down and getting through this shift because I am saving for a Roomba.
Jonah: That's fair, but you should know...
Kelly: Oh, no, no. No, thank you.

Cheyenne: You know what else I hate? That we have to clock out before we sanitize our stations. That's still work. I'm not disinfecting everything for my health. Well, I mean, yeah.
Carol: That's Corporate for you. They ride us till we drop and then immediately sell our ass meat.
Cheyenne: [laughts] God, you are so weird.
Carol: You're so weird. [laughs] You're totally not weird. You're gorgeous like a vodka girl. I wish I could do my makeup like you.
Cheyenne: Oh, it's so easy. Honestly, all you need is the right foundation. Oh. Here. You can have it. I ganked it from the makeup counter.
Carol: [laughs] [gasps] Oh, crap. I forgot to spider wrap that pallet of Zephra tablets.
Cheyenne: Oh, right, that's, like, a huge security risk. You know what, Carol? Don't worry about it. Honestly, if they get jacked, they get jacked. Zephra can eat our ass meat. [both laugh] [Carol caughs]

Marcus: Hey. So, uh, heard you're moving out.
Jonah: Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry, Marcus. I-I wanted to tell you.
Marcus: I just want you to know I'm not coming with you.
Jonah: Yeah, no, yeah, I thought that was to be assumed.
Marcus: I just don't think you're ready to have a roommate right now, and I deserve one who will shout it from the rooftops.
Jonah: You know what? You do, Marcus. You were never late on rent, you always filled up the Brita. You were a great roommate.
Marcus: Wow. That didn't suck to hear. Um, hey, we should come up with a new secret.
Jonah: Oh, I don't think we need to...
Marcus: Tonight, you and me, the quarry. We'll definitely see something messed up, and if it ever gets brought up, deny, deny, deny.
Jonah: Yeah, man. Let's do it.
Marcus: Do what? [clicks tongue]

Sayid: Jonah, I want you to meet two friends who have always been there for me. Ben & Jerry.
Jonah: [sighs]
Glenn: It's ice cream.
Jonah: I know what Ben & Jerry's is. Everybody does, Glenn. Thank you.

Glenn: Now I know this is your first call with someone from Zephra, but don't be intimidated. They're just regular folks like us who make six times as much money.
Dina: Oh, I'm not nervous. I'm excited. I'm finally getting my dope uncut straight from the dealer.
Glenn: Ah, yeah.
Warren: [video call begins] Hey there.
Dina: Warren, hi! Dina Fox, co-manager. Glad to be on the team. We're gonna do great things. Question for you: That Zephra CEO, she in a sex cult?
Glenn: Dina.
Warren: That's okay. I can't comment on any speculation as to the personal lives of Zephra executives.
Dina: Say no more.

Glenn: Can we talk about Carol's lawsuit?
Dina: Yeah, what's the move here, Warren? How are we gonna scrub the lice out of our hair?
Warren: [on video call] These things tend to clean up easy. You know, I mean, unless Carol were able to make the case that she were targeted, if she were generally unliked, if people avoided working with her, that sort of thing.
Dina: Yeah, here's, uh... Here's what's fun about that, Carol is a complete outcast.
Glenn: But only because she has such a bad personality.
Warren: Well, it really comes down to what's on record, so why don't you guys just go ahead and review the private messages on the employee app.
Glenn: Their- Their private messages?
Warren: It's all legal. All the employees agree to the terms of service in order to use the app.
Dina: And let's be honest, keeping tabs on the employees is the entire point of the app, am I right?
Warren: It is one of many features.
Dina: Ah, I like you, Warren. You're shady but in a way that feels legally vetted.