Sayid: Were you also the one who replaced the straws with these paper things?
Jonah: Yes.
Sayid: These have no structural integrity. Why did I even leave Syria?

Sayid: I was fleeing the civil war in Syria.
Cheyenne: Whoa, what was Syria like?
Sayid: Not good. Seriously, not good.
Glenn: Yeah, there's all sorts of, like, rampant destruction and beheadings and locusts, right?
Sayid: Yes, though the locusts had nothing to do with the war. They're a seasonal nuisance.
Dina: Hey, what are your thoughts on the movie, Syriana?
Sayid: I thought George Clooney was pretty okay, and Matt Damon was just okay.

All: [chant] Hey, hey, ho, ho, Duterte's gotta go. Hey, hey...
Sayid: Wow, you guys got the news to show up. Doesn't that make you nervous?
Mateo: Not really. I'm just one of those people that shines through the lens.
Sayid: If it were me, I'd probably be thinking, "Sayid, don't criticize the government on camera, because if it doesn't work and you do get deported, you're definitely getting tortured and murdered over there." Anyway, I'm gonna go play Pokemon Go. I hear there's a Snorlax near the loading dock.

Sayid: And why would I wanna turn you in? It's none of my business.
Mateo: I don't know, maybe you were afraid of getting into trouble. Like not saying anything might somehow make you my accomplice.
Sayid: Oh.
Mateo: But you're not. You are just an innocent bystander.
Sayid: Yes, in my experience, nothing ever happens to innocent bystanders.
Mateo: Look, Sayid. Sayid, don't worry about it. What are they gonna do, deport you for not ratting me out?
Sayid: I can honestly say that that thought had not occurred to me. [starts to back away]

Sayid: [to Jonah] You take away my break, and I'll run you over with your stupid hybrid car!

Justine: There she is. Dina, you have to take me off of Sayid's register.
Sayid: She calls everyone "Mama." "Hey, there, Mama." "Paper or plastic, Mama?" They're not your mama. Your mother lives in Sarasota.
Justine: You just can't handle women lifting up other women.

Sayid: Here I have my refugee identity certificate, my social security card, driver's license, electric bills proving my residence.
Officer: That's fine. That's fine.
Sayid: And here are pictures of me at the block party in my mostly white neighborhood. As you can see, everybody's smiling. The community is embracing me.

Sayid: I hate to complain, but that machine is so noisy. I'll feel like I'm praying on the wings of an airplane.
Amy: Well, there's no volume button, so...
Sayid: It's just that when I make my-
Amy: This is the sound it makes, Sayid!
Sayid: Okay. Okay.

Sayid: Are we doing announcements? I lost my favorite pen. It's a blue pen. The ink is also blue.
Mateo: Click or cap?
Sayid: Click.
Justine: On it.

Sayid: I want my 40 bucks back. That's two seasons of Ray Donovan on Blu-ray.