Amy Quote #406
Glenn: [on video] So, you wanna be a manager. You've worked your little tush off. You're on the fast track. But sloooow down. [holds up "Yield" sign] You still got a lot to learn. Welcome to tape four of Management Overview.
Garrett: When did he make this?
Amy: Last night. He stayed up till 11:30. He actually fell asleep through most of part one, but then he farted himself awake.
Quote from Glenn
Glenn: One time, I gave $100 bill in change when it was only supposed to be 35 cents.
Glenn: And then another time, I forgot to put anybody on the schedule, and I had to work the whole day alone in the store.
Glenn: And then, uh, and then one time I ate everybody's lunch by accident. And, um... Oh, I accidentally ordered some adult toys 'cause I thought they were puzzles.
Quote from Dina
Justine: Maybe you could be a bike messenger.
Dina: Uh, like Joseph Gordon-Levitt in Premium Rush? I think I'll pass on being chased around by a corrupt cop because I'm unknowingly delivering $50,000 to a Chinese human trafficker, thanks.
Garrett: What are you trying to do, get her killed?
Dina: What about scuba cop? Is that a job?
Jonah: I don't think I see that listed here.
Dina: It's a pass anyway.
Dina: Too worried about the bends.
Quote from Lady Boss
Jonah: It wasn't why I was doing it, but I really tapped into something here. These guys are really freaked out about the acquisition.
Amy: Yeah, everybody's freaked out. It's a freaky time. Just tell 'em to take it down and get back to work.
Jonah: Ah, but that'd kinda just be like a Band-Aid, wouldn't it?
Amy: Yeah, Band-Aids heal things. Why does everybody hate Band-Aids?
Quote from Maternity Leave
Amy: Sorry, you think that a bath bomb is the answer to all of my problems?
Glenn: It's not a real bomb, and-
Amy: Just kill yourself!
Amy: Kill yourself!
Amy: No, you don't get to talk right now! I am so tired! I have slept 90 minutes in three days. The lining of my uterus is coming out in clumps. I have hemorrhoids so big that my doctor looked at my [bleep] and said "Whoa!" Have you ever had a doctor look at your [bleep] and say that?
Glenn: [softly] No.
Amy: I am wearing frozen diapers so that my [bleep] doesn't fall out. Okay?!
Glenn: I know, I was just-
Amy: Why haven't you killed yourself?!