TV Quotes

Glenn: One time, I gave $100 bill in change when it was only supposed to be 35 cents.
Amy: Oh.
Glenn: And then another time, I forgot to put anybody on the schedule, and I had to work the whole day alone in the store.
Amy: Hmm.
Glenn: And then, uh, and then one time I ate everybody's lunch by accident. And, um... Oh, I accidentally ordered some adult toys 'cause I thought they were puzzles.

Justine: Maybe you could be a bike messenger.
Dina: Uh, like Joseph Gordon-Levitt in Premium Rush? I think I'll pass on being chased around by a corrupt cop because I'm unknowingly delivering $50,000 to a Chinese human trafficker, thanks.
Garrett: What are you trying to do, get her killed?
Dina: What about scuba cop? Is that a job?
Jonah: I don't think I see that listed here.
Dina: It's a pass anyway.
Jonah: Ah.
Dina: Too worried about the bends.

Marcus: I had just deuced in the shower.
Isaac: Ugh.
Cheyenne: Ugh.
Amy: Why?
Marcus: Okay, right, when you guys are in the shower and you have to go, you just hold it.
Amy: Yes. Yeah. That's what you do when it's a number two.
Marcus: Sure, so you don't poop in the shower every morning and stamp it down the drain with your feet? [Justine gags]
Isaac: Oh, my God.
Marcus: Okay, whatever. Screw you, snowflakes. Bunch of princesses.

Marcus: You know what, I'm in too. If it is a pyramid scheme, at least I will be on the top ahead of all these suckers.
Jonah: That is sound logic, Marcus.