Glenn Quote #463
Cheyenne: Well, I've heard that E-Verify is full of bugs. Just lots and lots of bugs.
Glenn: They're not bugs, Cheyenne. They're human beings.
Quote from Sayid
Sayid: I was fleeing the civil war in Syria.
Cheyenne: Whoa, what was Syria like?
Sayid: Not good. Seriously, not good.
Glenn: Yeah, there's all sorts of, like, rampant destruction and beheadings and locusts, right?
Sayid: Yes, though the locusts had nothing to do with the war. They're a seasonal nuisance.
Dina: Hey, what are your thoughts on the movie, Syriana?
Sayid: I thought George Clooney was pretty okay, and Matt Damon was just okay.
Quote from Mateo
Mateo: So Syria, huh?
Sayid: Why does everyone here start conversations like that?
Mateo: Ha. You know, I'm actually an immigrant, too. Not a refugee, like you. Knock on wood. [knocks twice] Just a regular, undocumented immigrant. Or is it "documented"? I'm always mixing those up. I think it's like inflammable-flammable, where they mean the same thing?
Sayid: No, they're opposites.
Mateo: Anyway, I'm definitely the legal kind. Came here legally, took the citizenship test, got sworn in by the president.
Sayid: The president swore you in?
Mateo: Uh-huh, yeah. Yeah. They, um... They do it personally. At least they used to.
Sayid: Which president?
Mateo: God, it's been so long, I don't even remember. One of the white ones? I wanna say... Henderson.
Quote from All Sales Final
Jonah: So... retirement, huh? Got any big plans?
Glenn: Yeah, I think I might finally watch The Queen's Gambit.
Jonah: Okay, so that's... seven episodes. What else?
Glenn: Well, I hadn't really thought much beyond that. Gosh, I guess there's gonna be a lot of hours to fill, huh?
Jonah: Yeah, yeah, but that's a good thing, right, Glenn? I mean, I'm sure you've got hobbies.
Glenn: No, 'cause work is all I've ever known, Jonah. I mean, I started at my dad's hardware store when I was eight, and before that, I worked at the tollbooth.
Jonah: Glenn, I'm sure you're gonna be fine. I- There's gotta be something that you can do.
Glenn: Well, what if I got a 500 piece puzzle? That'd take up some time, right?
Glenn: What, you want me to get a 1,000 piece puzzle? How much table space do you think I have, Jonah?
Quote from Conspiracy
Glenn: I'm sorry. Just... I started doing some research, and I came across this article, "The Truth About Zephra." I think there's some fishy business going on.
Dina: Oh, like tax evasion, offshore banking? What are we talking here?
Glenn: You know how everyone's pushing this 5G? Well, turns out 5 is the worst of the Gs. They say that it hits your brain at a certain frequency that lets them control human behavior.
Dina: You think Zephra's involved in mind control? Okay, that's enough screen time for you.
Glenn: No, it's not that I believe in mind control, but they are trying to control how we greet customers.
Dina: Glenn, enough. This is why old people shouldn't be allowed on the Internet.