Garrett Quote #720

Quote from Garrett in Local Vendors Day

Garrett: $8 for a bar of soap just 'cause it's shaped weird and wrapped in twine?
Jonah: Well, it's artisanal. It's organic.
Garrett: [sniffs] [scoffs] Ugh. I don't need my soap to be organic. We have science now. Science has created chemicals that keep us clean.

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 ‘Local Vendors Day’ Quotes

Quote from Marcus

Mateo: Wow. Can't believe you came on your day off to sell cheese you made out of breast milk.
Marcus: Yeah, well, it's been a lot of trial and error. You know, if you don't get the consistency just right, you get boob yogurt, and that's just gross. And then there's the scavenging. Oh, and then my lizard ate a bunch of my samples.
Mateo: Wait, wait, wait. Let's go back to scavenging.
Marcus: Well, I mainly work with found milk.
Mateo: Found milk?
Marcus: Mm-hmm. You know, a mom leaves a bottle on a table at a food court and, you figure she's okay with people taking a little off the top.
Mateo: [chuckles] [gags]

Quote from Dina

Cheyenne: Wow, I bet dating has changed so much since your time. How did you guys even send each other naked photos of yourselves?
Amy: Uh, just in the mail.
Cheyenne: Oh, my God. So much effort.
Dina: I sent a nude fax once.
Amy: Full face?
Dina: Full face. I mean, an artist signs her work.

 Garrett McNeil Quotes

Quote from Labor

Garrett: [over PA] Attention, shoppers. Is there a doctor in the... Who am I kidding? This is Cloud 9. Anybody here watched a lot of Grey's Anatomy? Maybe Nurse Jackie? Not The Knick.

Quote from Valentine's Day

Garrett: [over PA] Attention shoppers. It's Valentine's Day, and love is in the air, along with dust, pet dander, and toxic mold spores, so pick up a Supercloud air purifier and convince yourself it's making a difference, which it's not, 'cause it's just a fan.